Pain in my Heart
by wheretobe
Summary: My take on what happens after Halfwit, AU, Huddy all the way.
1. Chapter 1

Titled: Pain in my heart I

Author: wheretobe

Rating: M

Summary: Events after Halfwit [Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or it:s Characters. Fox does tho, and I'm just borrowing them for this snippet.

* * *

It had been Foreman who came to her the next morning, to tell her what the Ducklings had found out, how they went to House to tell him the good news, only to be disappointed beyond believe by their Mentor.

She had listened silently, sighed after the story had finished, then rubbed her eyes warily. Pushing the files to the side she leaned back in her chair, head turned to the side staring out one of the windows.

' Dr Cuddy...did you hear? He faked all of it, to go to Boston and get the treatment to get high.' He looked at her as if he waited what effect it would have, scrutinizing her closely.

'Tell me Dr Foreman what I am supposed to say now? That we should've known, he's a junkie after all. Or should I start cursing and threatening?'

Foreman looked at her angered

'Well something has to be done. He is a threat.'

Lisa gnawed at her lower lip, sighing once more.

'Dr Foreman, I understand the unprofessionalism House has once more shown and believe me he will face consequences, but do understand that it doesn't help right now that you stand here whining. Go back to your Job and let me think about what should be done now. Tell Dr's Chase and Cameron to complete this weeks clinic work. I'll take care of House.'

She motioned with her hand for him to leave, pulling the papers back in front of her and staring them down, waiting for the affirmative click of her door. It came and with it the held back flood of tears. They were silent, just rolling down her cheek, a mix of relief, anger, sadness and disappointment. A turmoil that would leave her empty. She turned with her chair to face the windows, shades drawn. Biting down on her lip to stop those damn sobs from escaping, wrecking her on the way. She wiped her cheeks angrily. She should've known, should've looked at the files more closely, request more blood from House and redo the bloodworks. She didn't though, because the feeling of him deadly sick simply had floored her.

When she had called Boston she was simply angered that House would consider going somewhere else. She wanted to make sure Boston knew it would be a hard fight, no she would never give up on him, she knew the Ducklings weren't ready to work on their own, their internal fights too a many and their knowledge not even close to House's. But the Diagnostics department was vital for PPTH and she wouldn't give that up without a fight. And she wouldn't let him leave her life once more.

It hit her even harder when they wouldn't confirm he was a patient nor tell her otherwise.

So he was sick. She heard the Dr.'s name before and she didn't associate a good feeling with him. The fist around her heart squeezed harder and harder.

No, she would not freak. Confirm first was her mantra on her way to Wilson.

She had felt so empty when she had come home that night, she barely made it through the door until the first sobs wrecked her slim form, dragging herself up to her bedroom she undressed as fast as she could crying and then went right into the shower, breaking down under the scalding hot spray of water.

'I heard the kids came to you bearing complains?'

It was too much. A dry sob wrung from her and she once more dissolved in tears.

After the Ducklings had left he tried going back to sleep. What was one more of his stunts to the people around him? He had never said he had cancer, never wanted their pity nor help. It was all their fault. They had made it all up.

He couldn't sleep though, something haunted him. No, not something, it was her. Her face, she tried being strong, tried not to say anything. But she broke when he had been about to leave her house again. Gave him something, so when he needed her, should that ever come, he'd know that she'd be there. Without shame and guilt he'd taken her up on her offer.

At first it was just a grab for her rear, he still doesn't know when it changed into something carrying emotion. Maybe when she hadn't pushed him away but simply held him tighter. Maybe when he started to feel the deep sadness ooze from her. In that moment he started feeling guilty.

House hadn't felt guilty in a long time. He had broken the hug, needing to get away from her before he would admit what he had done, try to make it better, tell her it was all just a bad joke, somehow breake her out of that sad state and put her into something else, even if it was anger.

Anger he could deal with. Shrug it of and hobble away. Her sadness seemed to consume him, always.

So he laid in bed, staring at his ceiling almost fearing what would come the next day, what he knew had to come. He hoped for anger, more clinic hours. He knew he would just have to make her impossibly mad with his attitude. Sometime around five a.m. he finally fell into a toss and turn sleep.

He made his way into the Hospital around eleven, thinking that alone should piss her off enough. Strutting into his office he hoped to find it empty. It wasn't.

'I told Dr Cuddy.'

Simple and straight forward.

'You told Cuddy about you fantasising to wear her undies on your head?' weak comeback but at least something. 'Still no reason to sit in my chair.' He motioned with his cane, trying to get Foreman to leave, he had no such luck, only eliciting a smirk from the neurologist.

'Hello? Cripple wanting to sit!' holding the cane up and shaking it viciously.

'This time you went too far.' finally, Foreman stood up and left.

When House was sure he was out of sight he hung his head for a second. Heaving a sigh he turned and left again, His shoulders felt heavy somehow, his gait was weaker.

Strutting into Wilson's office he threw himself onto the couch, sighing desperately to get attention.

'You messed up big time.' Said without looking up.

'I never said I ...' he couldn't finish the sentence because Wilson simply stood up and left, without turning back, not one glance.

He felt a little dumbstruck, no more chance to avoid seeing her. He tried imagining her as the big, bad, fire spitting dragon, only managing to see her image of last night, in night clothes, stripped of her power suits, her harsh demeanor. She simply had been drained, tired but still tried to be strong for him.

He mustered all the cockiness he had in himself and walked into her office without knocking. Her chair was turned towards the windows, shades drawn.

'I heard the kids came to you bearing complains?'

It was supposed to sound mocking, it didn't. It held no strength just maliciousness and he was shocked himself, just didn't show it.

He almost dropped his cane when he heard the first sobs break from her, shaky and ragged. His eyes widened to shock as he tried to think of something to say.

Lisa bit her lip harder, finally quieting down to speak.

'Lea...leave...'hiccups accompanied what sounded like the desperate plead it was.

She hopes, begged and prayed he would for once do as she asked. She knew deep down he wouldn't.

He softened, he was suddenly scared of the implications of his wrong doing.

'Lisa...I..' he slowly walked towards her, trying to thin of something to say, wishing he would have confided her in, explain to her what he was doing and why.

Closing her eyes she swallowed hard, wishing away the pain.

'Don't...just don't say anything. Leave.'

House couldn't, for once he felt the need to make it better. He walked around the table, put his cane on its top and then came standing before her, she tried turning away but he stopped her.

Looking up at him she felt no emotion at all at his forlorn look. Empty, thats what described it best.

'Lisa...', edged with a sudden shame and pleading.

He knew it'd be painful, he did it anyways. Slowly House knelt down on his good knee in front of her, his hands holding the chair in a death grip.

Shaking her head, eyes closed and tears still seeping out.

'I'm...I'm sorry.' He meant it. For the first time in years, he meant it, felt it with each fibre of his selfish being.

A snort, then she stood, pushing him down on his ass, and walked away, grabbing her purse and jacket on the way out.


	2. Chapter 2

He couldn't remember how long he sat slumped behind her desk.

It just made no sense to House. He'd pulled such things before, it wasn't even his fault that everyone had thought he had brain cancer. He had tried to keep it silent.

It was like being five again and telling your mother it wasn't you that threw the ball through the window, though she had seen you.

He knew he'd gone too far, had known it since they found out and somehow he felt touched that they'd tried so hard.

It was slowly getting darker and darker around him, he still sat waiting. Hoping she'd come back, see him on the floor, sigh and roll her eyes like usually and then forgive him. He didn't care if the others did, they'd get over it like usual. But Cuddy suddenly had given up, and that he couldn't deal with. All those times before he knew that she was somehow always standing behind him, she took care of each lawsuit.

Yes, she was often more than annoyed. After the Tritter thing he had been relieved that she only wanted him to do more clinic hours. Every other Administrator would long have fired him. Genius or not. And all the others before her had. None had kept him that long.

Last night he understood why. He mattered to her. Somehow, no matter what he had done to her in the past, he was not just a pity job to her. It wasn't just her guilt of crippling him that made her devoted, she actually liked him.

The door creeked open, House didn't even look up, it wasn't her. The steps crossing the room to strong and determined.

Wilson sighed as he looked at House huddled against the wall, under the window.

'Go home House.' grabbing the cane he held it out to him.

Jimmy had never believed it possible, but House looked bummed, seriously down. When the older man looked up at him he sighed, it was sad to look at him. The genius junkie, just trying to get the ultimate fix, not caring for the consequences until he saw what he did to her. Wilson would somehow always end up forgiving him, they stuck together, no one knew why. But this time it seemed as if he pushed his oldest friend away.

House shook his head. There it was again, the pity in Wilson's eyes. Like the others pitied him, the cripple who faced constant pain, who was unsocial, had no friends and if he had, drove them away in a matter of months, years.

'I need to...' actually he didn't know what he needed to do.

'You need to go home, before security finds you.' gentle poke with the cane. 'House, she pulled your licence and suspended you for a month.'

Somehow a chuckle escaped him, wretched from his throat. She'd done this before, he could deal with that, no problem, at least some kind of punishment.

'A month...' shaking his head, so he still had a chance she would forgive him.

On his way home he somehow found himself taking an unusual turn, ending up at her place somehow. He was annoyed with his inner force, but knew he had least had to try.

Her lights where already switched off and for a moment he pondered to turn and leave but decided to go for it.

She was rolled up on her couch, eyes puffy and red rimmed, hair frilly and unkempt, her clothes baggy. A hanky in her left hand, already soppy. She had simply driven home to cry it out. And that she had done for the better part of her day she had been crying over the bastard. Cursing him, Cursing herself that she had been fooled.

A ring made her jolt upright, her doorbell. She took the blanket and wound it tightly around her, shielding her from who she knew would be standing before the door. Looking through the peephole her fear was confirmed. Closing her eyes she took a step back from the door, only her right hand lingering on the cool wood.

Another ring accompanied by a knock, a hard rapping. She made no move.

House leaned his head against the door heavily.

'C'mon...open' it was a mumble nothing more. The door shook slightly as the bolds where loosened. He took a step back so he wouldn't fall face first into her front hall. His head still hung low, the weight n his shoulders had increased considerably and he suddenly felt alone, it scared him. He couldn't muster enough strength to lift his head, look at her.

'I want you to leave Dr House.' It sounded strangely strong and cold in her own ears.

'I just need to explain, please, you'll understand.' He looked pleading. A five year old asking for forgiveness after found lying.

'I need no more explanation.'

She was about to close the door again, he held it open willing her to listen.

'Lisa...I never meant for everyone to...'

Fire blazing in her eyes as she looked at him sharply.

'You never meant what House? To make us find out about your hoax, so you could go on lying?' she viciously poked his chest with her pointy finger. He had to take a step back, in fear she'd stab him down. He could barely shake his head.

'You enjoyed every second of attention you had from everyone. You liked the fact we were to stupid to find out, that you once more were superior. Just a simple blood test would have been all. No cancer markers. But you knew I wouldn't request it. Tell me House did you enjoy it? Was it funny to use my pain against me?'

He swallowed hard, 'I ...'

_Say something idiot!! Explain the treatment, tell her about your hopes of a pain therapy._

He stuttered like an idiot. He couldn't get himself to simply say he was sorry that he never thought it'd hurt her, that he always thought she simply kept him for his work, not friendship.

Cuddy shook her head, her shoulders slumped as another tear escaped her, against her will.

His hand lifted on his own will, slowly, softly stroking the tear away with a calloused thumb.

It actually shocked him, the stinging pain in his left cheek. His head twisted from the force.

'You bastard made me believe you'd die within a year for some fix. You saw how it pained me and everyone else but we didn't matter. You just wanted another high.'

More tears escaped, her voice shaky. Then the door closed with a bang, left him standing outside, rubbing his cheek, head once more hung low.

i b Five days later /b /i 

She closed the bag after packing what she thought she would need. Like a robot she carried it down to her car, put it in the trunk with the other bags and then closed the trunk again.

She felt like running, but this time she needed to go, before she would face even more pain because she was not able to keep her feelings out of her job.

i maybe muse strikes me again and I'll make it into a happy end, sappy, make you cry so much story. /i 


	3. Chapter 3

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 3  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: He went way too far. Returned with a new chapter for lj user"silentsnark" and lj user"elliejgirl"  
Pairing: None yet  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

He'd been drunk for three days straight after he'd encountered that she had left. After a week of sitting at home without anything to do he wanted to go to her and beg her for his license. Cuddy wasn't in her chair though. It had been Wilson, a pitiful look on his face as he saw House.

Jimmy told him then that she had left for unknown time and that he was, for that time span, the Hospitals administrator. Not just that she had gone, but Wilson also couldn't get his revoked license back but that Cuddy also gave the board the instruction not to give it back to him until she herself requested it. He was not only useless, he had also driven the only person away who had still cared about him.

He had suddenly felt alone in his apartment, he had felt hollow and couldn't understand what had happened to him. So he drowned his sorrows, the situation reminding him too much of another woman. His heart was clenched by a huge fist, slowly squeezing the last life of it.

He was currently occupying his couch, laying sprawled on it, his right with a bottle of Jack Daniels dangling of the edge. All his senses were muted, he had no idea if it was day or night. All he knew was that he screwed it.

A key was turning in his lock, it registered somewhere but he couldn't care less, he just took another long pull from the bottle.

'My god House it smells like something died in here...' Wilson said, then saw him on the couch.

'Well...apparently I was right with that.'

He could barely focus on Jimmy, the room was spinning dangerously whenever he opened his eyes, the earth shifting under him. Closing his eyes again he tried swallowing down the nauseous feeling, his tongue twitching.

'Ju...st leave me ...al...alone' his tongue was almost numb, the words tumbling of it.

'Oh House...' Accompanied by a deep sigh. 'Why are you doing this to yourself?'

House closed his eyes, more painful memories. 'She, left...left me'

'Stacey?'

He snorted. He couldn't have cared less about Stacey right now. He tried to take another pull from the bottle, but it cluttered to the floor empty.

Wilson in the meantime had sat down and watched him, his head constantly shaking.

'I thought you had gotten over her.'

'Not...Stacey.' he turned, pressing his heated face against the cold leather of the couch, he could barely stop himself from retching at the thought of being left alone once again and knowing how much he had hurt her.

Jimmy's eyes widened at the confession 'You mean Cuddy?'

'No Mother Theresa' He tried rolling his eyes which only made him more sick.

Another pitiful stare from Wilson and he would truly puke.

'She's gonna kill me...' Said Wilson and then put a piece of paper on his coffee table before he left.

An address, scrawled in her feminin script. His heart made a leap and with it his stomach did, emptying until it held nothing else.

Three weeks had passed. Three weeks in her refuge, where she had finally found time to unwind. Lisa had spend her days on the porch, or at the beach, basking in the salty sea air, feeling like new born. Finally she had found the time to read all the books she had bought to read.

She had almost forgotten why she was here. But at night, when she lay alone in her big cold bed, everything came back to her. The chances she had never had, The tries of finding someone, then knowing they would never be like him. No one would ever be like House. Don had been right, with him she allowed herself to be who she really was, compassionate, without putting restraints on her person so she could be the Dean of Medicine, the classy woman who knew how to talk people into Donating money. Around him she could let her facade slip.

But alone in her bed she yearned for someone to hold her, had often imagined it was him. When she thought he would die she had seen her world slip. Her dreams seemed to be never coming true. And all this had just been a lie. A stupid lie from a junkie.

Even here she had imagined him spooning her from behind, hugging her to him softly and each night, when her back stayed cold, she would cry herself to sleep.

She went to bed around midnight, her routine the same as ever. Cleaning her face of the few remnants of make up, combing her frilly hair, putting on her nightgown, then slipping into her bed, the curtains across the room billowing in front of the opened window. The cold slowly creeping into her room, cooling everything down. She laid facing away from the window, pulling the blankets up to her chin shivering.

She closed her eyes and tried not to imagine him, she knew if she ever wanted to resolve her problems she needed to stop feeling unprofessional about him, needed to pull herself back or it would cost her dearly. He couldn't stop being who he was, not even for her, had pushed too far once too often.

She sighed as she once more felt him behind her, his warm form wrapping around her, muscled arms pulling her against him to keep her warm. Tears started welling behind her closed eyes, knowing that if she opened them now the illusion would be broken. He smell, warmth, the solid form behind her would vanish. Drawing in a shaky breath she tried to calm herself, still the tears kept welling, a tiny sound escaping her throat against her will as she felt weak for once more succumbing to the painful wishing.

'I'm sorry for what I did Lisa. I know I went too far, knew it when you hugged me that one night'

Her eyes ripped open as she heard him speak to her, his warm breath tickling the back of her neck, his arms tightening around her so she couldn't jump out of bed. He was real, he was with her, he had broken into her summer house, slipped into bed behind her, hugged her close.

She struggled, wanting to break free, get away from him and the pain he had made her feel. He only held her closer.

'Lisa, I can explain, if you will only listen. The treatment, I wanted to go to Boston to find out if it ...it might have made my leg better' He said it with remorse in his voice.

'And I should've told you the truth.'


	4. Chapter 4

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 4  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: He went way too far.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

She struggled against the hold of his arms until she found all her strength drained. The crying and moving together had left her a weak sniffling mass in his strong arms.

He pressed his nose against her cold neck, breathing on her. She must've hit his leg in the process of struggling, he winced and her struggling finally stopped.

'Just let me explain, then you can still hate me, but let me explain this.' He held something soft in his voice, something vulnerable and hurt, it made her turn in his arms.

She looked at him, her eyes swimming, his didn't hold the usual cockiness, he looked tired, like he hadn't slept for ages.

She shook her head.

'It doesn't matter what the explanation is Greg. It matters that you didn't confide me and that you let me believe you were going to die.'

With that she slipped out of bed.

He followed her after some minutes he needed to squelch the pain. Cuddy was in the kitchen, leaning heavily against the Island counter and looking out of the window. He pulled a chair close and heavily sat on it. The pain in his leg was searing and he rubbed it absentmindedly.

She sighed and poured him a glass of water looking down at him almost softly, then walked into the front hall where his coat lay haphazardly on the floor. After some rummaging in his pockets she found what she was looking for and went back to the kitchen.

She looked at the pill bottle in her hand as she came to stand in front of him, she knew his life was reigned by pain, she understood his search for help, the methods she was not ok with.

He looked up at her with what could be explained as House's own description of the puppy dog look. Which meant he couldn't look into her eyes at all. She handed him two pills and held the water to him. He stopped himself from dry swallowing the medicine for her sake only and took a strong pull from the glass.

Her standing so close to him alone made him forget the pain, he leaned his head against her midriff tiredly. He was tired, of life, of pain, of being alone with all those burdens, of hurting her. It was an endless cycle he hated, but still couldn't break from it. She was warm and unbelievable soft and a sigh of relief broke from him when she softly stroked his cheek, almost as if she needed to feel that he really was there.

'Oh Greg...'

She softly stroked through his unruly hair and felt the tenseness in his shoulders vanish. He turned his face into her tummy inhaling the scent.

'You could've told me, I would've never declined help.'

she felt sorry for him, she had done this to him, put the scar on his leg, the constant pain but to save him, keep him alive and with her.

He looked up at her then. 'I needed to do this ...you know me Lisa.'

She knew what he meant, stroking his cheeks softly.

'Yes, but it doesn't change what you did or make it any better.'

She turned away then, another pang of pain shooting through her. The hurt sat deep and it would need time to heal but now she wasn't even sure what she wanted anymore.

He reached for her, needed her close again but she was out of reach. She wrapped her arms around herself then, shaking slightly from cold and tiredness. She looked at him again, a puddle of self pity, sadness and pain, all mingled into one damaged package.

She held her hand out to him, trying to muster something like a soft smile, not failing but not able to manage either.

'C'mon, lets go to bed, you look tired.'

When she had turned away from him he thought he had missed his chance, but now looking at her outstretched hand he felt a glimmer of hope touching him. He took her tiny hand into his large one and slowly stood up. He felt her squeeze his hand and another weight lifted of him.

It must've been a funny sight, the pair of them. He hobbled after her as best as he could, his cane lay forgotten next to her front door. Back in the bedroom she helped him get undressed, slowly peeling his jeans of his leg, waiting for a comment that never came.

'Did you bring anything to wear?' she spoke softly, almost whispering.

'Yea, a backpack, it's downstairs.'

He couldn't look at her once more. Staring down at his scar, still fidgeting with his boxer shorts, trying to pull it a little more over the ugly and deformed flesh. She stopped his hand softly.

'Stop, it doesn't bother me.'

She turned to leave, but couldn't because he was holding on to her hand.

'Please stay with me.'

He reminded her of a child, he sounded afraid that she would leave.

'Greg...I don't think...'

She couldn't finish the sentence, had to stop as he looked at her with those sad eyes. So she slowly slipped into bed after him, stroking the hair of his forehead.

'What have you gotten us into?'

He had created a mess, a private hell for them. Still it was the first time she had felt him care. House didn't answer, instead he pulled her closer and she let him. They would have to deal with what he did, but at least they would do it together. She knew they still had a long way to go but at least she knew that he would be beside her.

For the first time in three weeks she fell to sleep, her heavy heart lifted a little.


	5. Chapter 5

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 5  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: I couldn't keep myself from writing more after finding nothing to read. I've read almost all the Huddy fics and I feel depressed.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

When Cuddy woke up that morning the bed was empty and cold. She panicked, thought she had lost her mind and she had imagined it all. The great Dean of Medicine was starting to lose her mind, her heart she had already given to what some would say the devil in human form. Rolling onto the side which had been occupied by him she looked for any indicators that spelled derailed personality problem to her, but then she smelled it, House's faint smell, like soap and something sinful.

A smile crept onto her face, the night and the sleep it had brought had been good for the both of them. She had finally been able to sleep for a whole night, the memory of his arms slung around her, his warmth enveloping her still so fresh. From downstairs she could here a faint clatter of pans or pots, and then more sounds and smells made their way into her still sleepy brain.

Coffee, Cuddy could definitely smell that, among other 'breakfasty' things. She made her way out of bed and into the bath, showering quickly before walking down to the kitchen.

From the doorway she watched him trying to make breakfast, which he probably hadn't done in ages, a cookbook leaned against a pack of eggs, flour covered the better part of the kitchen and a smudge of pancake batter adorned House's left cheek. Cuddy smiled again knowing he tried to get back into her good books, he actually made an effort for her.

'You need some help?' she couldn't keep the smile out of her voice.

House groaned as he saw her standing in the doorway watching him. He had wanted to make breakfast for them, show her he was trying, really trying. Only to find out that he didn't know one pancake receipt, after he had to throw the first bowl of batter away. He rolled his eyes and got even more mopey as he saw that Cuddy couldn't stop smiling, she probably thought he was cute. He innerly spat at the word.

She crossed the kitchen and looked at the chaos he had created with a slight frown. The kitchen looked like a battlefield.

'Batter exploded again?' she smirked at him.

'Feeling superior now?' His frown deepened, which made him look like the petulant five year old that he often was.

He reckoned that it was at least a good sign that she was playful. Maybe the anger was slowly fading. At least he hoped.

His train of thought was broken as he heard Cuddy's laugh, not the fake I-want-to-impress-a-donor laugh he often heard, no the true and full fledged Cuddy laugh he hadn't heard in years, at least not guided towards him. House turned to her almost pouting by now, which only made her laugh harder.

She bit the inside of her cheek to keep the giggles from erupting, but when he turned to her looking all pouty, in the midst of the mess, she couldn't stop herself.

'You know how adorable you look right now?' throwing in another giggle fit for the effect, it almost made her bend over holding her tummy.

'Awesome...and here I was trying to make an effort, just to get laughed at and insulted.' He closed the cookbook annoyed and slumped down on the nearby chair.

She stopped laughing immediately when she saw that he was seriously bummed, slumped in his chair looking disappointed with himself, and then a flicker of last nights House crossed his features.

'Oh c'mon now House, its nothing big and the thought counts right?' sitting down next to him she bumped his shoulder with hers in a friendly manner.

'Lets clean this mess and then cook together.'

Cuddy leaned her chin on her hands, looking at him softly and grateful. House nodded reluctantly, smirked and dipped his finger into the batter bowl before painting her nose with it. It made her smile, the softness of the moment, House in this rare mood, it reminded her of old and better days when they had been friends in Michigan.

They were leaning towards each other slowly, each caught in the eyes of the other. On the inside she panicked, this wasn't supposed to happen, she was supposed to forget him, to pull away so she could deal with him and his destructive demeanor. But her heart sped up nonetheless, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. His breath was tickling her cheeks, his eyes filled with something she could probably identify as longing.

An egg rolled of the island counter, landing on the tiled floor with a crash, its contents spilling everywhere.

Cuddy jumped, shocked by the sudden interruption, and almost fell of her chair. A string of curse words left House's mouth and he grabbed a handful of paper towels.

Softly she took the paper towels and managed to smile a little strained.

'It's ok, I got it.'

Getting up and bending down she cleaned the latest mess, while House started to wipe the flour painted surfaces down.

He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes. Her cheeks had reddened and her hands seemed a little shaky. He felt remorse creeping through him. He had almost kissed her, the spell broken by a damn egg, and probably pushing her away farther, pulling her guards back up.

Lisa looked at him as he stubbornly wiped down the Island counter, she didn't know what was happening to her, to them, but something in the balance had shifted, started pushing and pulling at them. She wanted so desperately give in to him. Let him sweep her off her feet until they had to return back to the real world. But then? He would probably be back to his old self. Kick her in the shins for forgiving him, shut her out again.

The question was if she could deal with it. Could she let go when he pushed her away, or would she break all over again?

Sighing seemed to be her form of breathing around him.

She stilled his hands on the counter and made him turn to her and look at her. Cuddy softly bit her lip as she looked up at him as if trying to find the answer in his blue orbs. He understood, she could see him soften.

'I'm trying, I...need time but I'm trying...' said in a pleading tone that was unusual for House. He said the truth.

Lisa pushed up on her tiptoes and gently wiped his cheek clean.

'I know, we need time House. I need time to heal, forget what you did, how painful it was. But I appreciate that you put effort into it. I just...if this is just temporary until you made me give you your license back, or until you have the next funny idea, then...then we should stop right here and you should go back home.'

Looking up at him she seemed small, frail, which she was after what he had done.

'I won't promise you to be another person Cuddy. But I am sorry about how it happened and I want to...I don't know... apologize, make it better I guess. I'm a doctor thats my drive. I don't know what I'll be like in an hour, or in a day, when the pain worsens again, when all that seems to exist is this white ball of pain.'

His voice had gotten louder and disappointed, filled with anger towards the world and the powers that had turned against him. She understood, knew all along why he is who he is. His breathing almost turned erratic as he tried to explain.

'But...when it happens, when it comes back...I ...' he closed his eyes trying to form the words.

'Look I really want you...with me down the paved road to hell ok? I'm not asking for you to give up yourself or anything of that romantic shit. I just want your company, whatever you want to give me. Friendship or constant kicks in the ass. I got used to you being with me and in whatever way you are willing to stay with me.'

House was at a loss for words, couldn't form what he wanted to say, to scared to be pushed away and left again and Cuddy understood his reluctance. She had seen what happened to him when Stacy had left him. He feared she'd do the same.

The worst was that at the moment she had to admit that she was still not sure if she would. Unsure if she should really go back to PPTH and to him.


	6. Chapter 6

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 6  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

House saw how her face changed. He knew he had hurt her deeply, so deep that she might not be able to come back to the hospital, more importantly to him.

'I just want ...a chance to show you that even if it's not always working, I'm trying to be better to you.'

Lisa squeezed his arm tenderly, trying to reassure him. She was grateful he tried so hard, knew that once they were back he would be his grumpy mopey self but maybe just a little softer to her.

She had to smile as he wet a paper towel and softly wiped the batter of her nose.

'House...stay here, lets see how this works out?' She was unsure if it was the right thing to do, but on the other hand she's be feeling bad if she wouldn't try.

House nodded, sat down again to relieve his leg.

'You ok?'

Cuddy looked worried and put a hand on his shoulder, then took it away as if burned remembering that he was against such shows of affection. His head shot up, his eyes piercing hers.

'Be careful, you're almost nice to me.'

The edge was back in his voice as he looked at her wary. She tried not to feel hurt, she knew it was the pain speaking, he was rubbing his thigh again, instead of stepping back she stepped closer, her hand landing on the side of his neck, her thumb stroking in a soft caress.

'What if I want to be nice?'

It was a challenge, Lisa knew and hoped he would take it. Whatever chance had presented itself to them, with his following her, she would just take it. She could run away still if it turned against her, but for once in her life she wanted to do something for herself, for him and ultimately for them.

House's eyebrows shot up for the fraction of a second, his eyes took a dangerous glint and Lisa knew then that she had him. The challenge was on.

She felt him leaning into her touch, his eyes closed shortly and he inhaled deeply. As he looked at her again his eyes had darkened considerably. His hands landed on her hips, pulling her against him so he could lean against her like the night before. He stopped thinking about the searing in his leg, House only thought about her sweet smell, like summer and a whiff of ocean, her warmth luring him closer, a smile pulled at his facial muscles, he feared he'd have muscle pains in the evening from all the smiling. Cuddy hugged him back, enveloping him in warmth and smell, she leaned down pressing her face into his hair, taking in the manly scent.

'Don't let this be pity Cuddy. Don't make this about my scar.'

He sounded almost vulnerable, he feared he'd be reduced to his leg and the pain, to her pity but she only leaned closer, hugging him tighter.

His tummy rumbled loudly which forced a groan from him. House had almost forgotten that he was hungry. Lisa kissed the crown of his head and then stepped back from him.

'Let's see what we still have here and then make breakfast. I will have to go to town and get more groceries though, with two stomachs to fill now.'

She was back in administrator mode, planning and thinking through and ahead.

'We.'

He simply offered, his head already buried deep in the fridge.

'What?' Lisa took all the things he handed her wondering how hungry he was.

'We need to go to town. I might need some more clothes too, I didn't bring much, I thought you'd throw me out right away'

As he turned around after closing the fridge he bumped into her, before Cuddy could stumble backwards he slung his arm around her and steadied her. The smirk was back on his lips, it hadn't reached his eyes yet though. Her cheeks turned red almost immediately, the close proximity making her remember how long it had been for her to be close to someone.

Don and her could have had a nice time, but House as so often before had interfered. She had finally had the guts to ask him if he liked her, the look in his eyes was the answer. This made his next antic hurt even more, the knowledge that he did like her, just both of their stubbornness in between them.

Now, this close to him, she felt herself warming, his heart was beating strong and steady. She smiled up at him, breaking the contact and turning from him. Looking at all the ingredients she thought about what to make.

'So are you really that hungry? I could make some Omelette's.'

She turned back to him, standing in the middle of her kitchen, slightly leaning on his right, a smile broke from her.

'Goody...I found some mens clothing store, over there, 'Earl's fishing and hunting gear'. Would you still want me in rubber pants?'

He waggled his brows, the annoyed undertone almost erased by his playfulness.

'Throw in flannel boxers and you'd sweep me off my feet'

Lisa rolled her eyes at him and loaded more of the groceries into her range Rovers trunk. Of course he was not helping her but at least he seemed a bit more like his lively self.

'I know a store down the road, but get used to the more nature oriented clothing.'

Another two hours later and they had bought the essentials for him, another two pairs of jeans, shirts and undergarments. He even had found two shirts with funny imprints. It even seemed that he had enjoyed it a little and promised to cook for her that night, the only thing he could actually cook.

'Mac' n' Cheese? You want to make your world famous...Mac 'n' cheese?'

Cuddys eyebrow raised.

'You liked it back in Michigan.'

'I was a student and almost all the times broke, you offered a free meal, sure I liked it.'

She grinned and got into the car, memories of those long ago times filling her head. How she and the legend Gregory House used to hang out with each other, how they became friends, how agile he was back than, how happy. He was the same Ass back then, but at least he had his happy moments.

'We going home sometime soon?'

House was already in the seat beside her, drumming his fingers on the dashboard annoyed.

Home, he had called the place they stayed at home and her heart made a leap and fluttered.

'Yea...we're going right now'


	7. Chapter 7

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

They had been spending the rest of the day inside after the rather strenuous clothes shopping. Before they went back to her house, or home as House had referred to it, they had been eating at a small Diner enjoying the easy going companionship that slowly build between them. Now that they were home Cuddy was reading a book and House was trying to distract her by trying to get her to participate in his crossword. She had been reading the same paragraph for 10 minutes now without anything making it into memory.

'House, I'm trying to read, it's not like you couldn't solve this crossword on your own'

She glared at him, as he sat slouched in the recliner, looking over the edge of his newspaper.

'But its more fun this way.'

He was whiny, which was an indicator for him being bored. She had thought about going for a walk with him but then the weather had turned rain washing over the land. She rolled her eyes as he gave her another pleading look and then made him some place on the couch, which he gladly accepted. After he had finished positioning himself on the couch he leaned into the cushions heavily and beckoned her over.

'What now?'

Instead of answering he simply pulled her over so she half leaned against him, in a cocoon between his body's left side and the backrest of the couch. Lisa looked at him oddly and confused, which resolved in House rolling his eyes at her.

'D'uh, so you can see the crossword'

She nodded and turned her head back to the crossword, her back all tingly from where it touched his side. She wasn't sure if she should like the almost tender him or feel scared. He was looking over her head, jotting down words from time to time, and she knew that getting her to help him with the crossword was just a plot to get her into his arms. It was endearing somehow, and it screamed House. Getting someone to do something for him without making that person aware of the fact.

Instead of breaking the contact she got the afghan off the back of the couch and draped it over them. The longer she was in this warm embrace the heavier her eyelids grew until they slowly shut and she fell into a soft slumber.

He smiled down at her then kissed the top of her head, feeling that now that she was asleep it was safe to do. Being with her had suddenly made some parts of the old House resurface. He thought that one was dead, apparently he was wrong and what he knew all along was affirmed.

He had a soft spot for Lisa Cuddy.

Since he was at the house he had taken a little less Vicodin, the pain seemed to matter less now that he had other things on his mind. He had always wondered what it would be like to have her this close, but his imagination was far from the reality. She was small, delicate, well defined lines and softness in one warm package. Her breathing was deep and even, her face had softened when she fell asleep, her worries, he knew, had left her for that shortness of sleep. He knew part of that was his fault. He was her worry. But right now he just cared to be for once. No thinking, just trying out something he had denied himself long, a little happiness and comfort.

He solved the crossword and put the paper on the ground, his leg would hate him for the position he was in, still he relaxed against the cushions and hugged her closer. He loved her smell he had to admit. It was pure female, something fresh and flowery, a little salty. He sniffed her hair again before burying his face in the mass enjoying its silky softness.

Cuddy awoke as it started dawning outside. She groaned, trying to ward of the wakefulness and turned her face to bury it in his warm side. House made a deep rumbling sound in his chest and then stiffened. She could feel his body tighten as he tried to somehow move so the pain would stop.

Opening her eyes she moved away from him carefully and then got him the pills from the water table.

'Thanks'

He rasped it tiredly before dry swallowing a pill, after the effect kicked in he sat up and rubbed his thigh absentmindedly. She was sitting beside him again, looking at him.

'I'm ok, hungry. What about you?'

'I'm a little hungry too, you want to make your world famous dish now?'

She had to admit it tasted better than she remembered. Or maybe it was just the cooking together, the company. She knew it was inevitable to resolve what had happened, but right now she just enjoyed the company, the way it felt laying in his arms. Maybe it was all just a dream and it would probably end soon, and maybe they could find a base of understanding, a truce. She hoped for that.

They sat on the couch after having cleaned the dishes together, House sitting on one of the Island counter chairs, scrubbing the plates, Cuddy drying them and putting them away.

This time she was prepared for his boredom and had gotten more crossword puzzle magazine from a Gas station just outside of town. As she came back he had rummaged through her CD collection and decided for Blues. The CD's he had decided against lays strewn in the shelve next to the CD player. Lisa was reading her book while House solved one puzzle after another in record times.

Another song came on and House's ears almost visibly perked, a soft smile lining his features. Jimmy Reeds slow 'Outskirts of town' howled lazily through the speakers. She understood while House was fond of Blues. The slow melodies, lazily wafting through the air, making you feel like on a hot day in Louisiana, sitting on a porch trying to ward of the dry hotness. It seemed as if the melodies where made up, a spur of the moment thing, luckily recorded and stored. House's body seemed to hum with the music. Then his face darkened again and she couldn't stop asking.

'What?'

'I miss dancing to such music. Slow and soft, just moving, swaying.'

She could understand that he missed such an everyday thing. Every time he told her things he missed she felt an ache in her chest. Even if he told her a hundred times that he would've done the same, in the end it had been Cuddy's decision for the surgery, her fault he missed dancing.

She decided she would try to give something back.

'Stand up'

He looked confused at first, took the cane she handed him nonetheless.

'Nobody wants you to dance a Waltz or Fox. Slow dancing should be ok with the cane.'

She was set, her mind made up.

'C'mon Cuddy...its nothing really. I just wanted to say something.' _I don't wanna look stupid in front of you. _

'Maybe I want to dance with you'

She had that challenging come hither look again. She stepped close to him, having to look up to see his face, smiling reassuringly. The Song changed to Otis Rush's even slower 'I can't quit you baby' and House finally enclosed her with his arm, the other leaning on the cane as they started to simply sway to the music, sometimes taking a step back and forth, varying, coming closer and closer until no sliver of light would fit between them.

Their bodies pressed together in all the right places, his arms slung around her form making her feel safe and warm. And not just that, when half of the song had played his look had become almost smoldering, she felt her face redden and pressed it against his chest. He was lean and lank, soft and hard in all the right places, the strenuous cane walking building muscle in his chest, arms and back, which felt wonderful under her hands now.

His breath was washing over her in hot cascades leaving her feeling fuzzy. His face was pressed against the hollow between her neck and shoulder and somehow his lips ended up moving over her skin just as lazy as the Blues. She shuddered and hugged him tighter. Lisa was sure she could come up with ten dozen reasons that this was wrong. But right now it felt good.


	8. Chapter 8

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

The CD had stopped playing minutes ago and still they were swaying little, their lips fused together in an even more intimate dance. Cuddy's hands were under House's shirt, her nails raking over the planes of his chest and flat stomach, soft hair tickling her fingertips. 

He moaned and tipped her head back further, she opened her mouth to him and let his tongue sweep over hers. It was pure sensory overload. The smell of him, the sounds and the feel of his hands grabbing at her, trying to get her even closer. The room seemed to heat up with every minute they continued their dancing.

She wondered if they'd simply combust if they kept kissing and dancing like this. She felt hot in all the right places, wanting nothing more at the moment than to be consumed by this.

'Lisa...'

As he broke their kiss she tried to lean back in, get him to keep kissing her, needing it more than anything. But Instead of kissing her he leaned his cheek against hers, panting.

'...just, let me sit...'

She remembered then, nodded and steered him to the couch, letting him sit before coming to stand between his legs. House looked up at her, his eyes shimmering with lust, his lips redder than before and his breath coming out in little puffs.

With her tiny hands Lisa framed his scruff face, leaning in to kiss him sensually. His hands landed on her sides, squeezing softly before running up and down, slipping in her pullover and leaving goosebumps in their wake. She moaned into his mouth before being pulled onto his lap, taking extra care not to sit on his thigh.

It felt refreshing, this new power over Greg House. Sitting on his lap she was a little taller than him, feeling him hard and ready beneath her.

The next Cd in the player started playing, filling the room with Paula Cole's sensual 'Feelin' Love' which was like a soundtrack to their night.

Slowly House's hands stroked her pullover up over her body, Cuddy lifted her arms and helped him get it off, her body felt tingly and she yearned for his touch on her bare skin.

And he fullfilled her wish, as soon as the offending garment had gone, his bare calloused hands explored every inch of her soft skin. First he was kneading her shoulders, stroking down over her back to round her tummy before letting his hands wander to her full breasts.

It was heaven, the feel of his large hands cupping her breasts, the bra rubbing against her sensitive spots.

It had been one of the most exquisite experiences of her life and still she had a feeling of regret hovering over her. Where would this be going? Would they still be the same in their usual environment? Would he be able to confide her in?

Those Questions loomed over her, House was already asleep, once again spooned against her back , hugging her tightly, and snoring in a very content way.

Lisa rubbed his arm softly thinking about the way he had looked down at her while making love to her. He had looked at her with adoration and tenderness.

She wished that this would've happened under different circumstances. Everything seemed rushed, he tried being good, nice, to prove her he could do better. But then again she started missing the old House. The ass that cost the Hospital way too much, didn't care about patients but still got his job done. She couldn't say she didn't like the new tender House. She just desperately wanted the edge of their arguing back. It made her feel alive, spurred her to always be good and better.

'God stop thinking, sexed Dr trying to sleep.'

It was a deep rumble which went from his chest to her back, making them both hum with the sound. He placed a wet kiss on her neck and drew her in closer.

House had loved it to explore her endless soft skin for hours and he loved it to just be pressed against the expanse of her back. His hand snuck upwards until it reached one full and fleshy globe, massaging softly.

'Mmmmhhh...have I told you how great you feel in my hands?'

Cuddy could feel him smile against her shoulder and sighed softly.

'A couple of times actually.'

A fingertip made its way down her spine ripping a shudder from her.

'Oh God!'

'House is enough'

She whacked his arm before turning to him and kissing him deeply. She would just stop thinking about what he did and the consequences for now. Just for tonight when all she needed to feel alive was him making sweet love to her.


	9. Chapter 9

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 9  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R (just to make sure)  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

Once again Cuddy found herself lying alone in the bed when she woke up. She stretched to loosen some of the soreness in her body, finding it actually pleasurable, she found herself aching in all the right places. The only thing that was missing now was Greg beside her, sighing she stood and went downstairs, finding him on the couch watching TV.

'Morning'

Greg looked at her before going back to watching his show.

'Are you ok?'

Lisa was worried, he seemed gruff and in pain, rubbing his thigh while staring at the screen.

'Leg. '

One mumbled word. The pain must've been almost a seven by now.

'Have you taken your meds?'

She sat down beside him trying to get him to talk to her. He shook his head.

'Greg...'

only stoical zapping, nothing else. She stood up and got him the pills.

'Take one.'

'It's ok'

She looked at him exasperated.

'House take a pill, you can't even move because of the pain'

' I said it's ok'

More and faster zapping, Cuddy wondered when the remote would simply break in two.

'Please, Greg, it's honrable that you try taking less, but now your in pain'

Once again she held the pill bottle to him. His head shot around and he gave her a menacing glare, taking the pill bottle and throwing it against the closest wall.

'I WOULDN'T EVEN BE IN PAIN IF I COULD'VE TAKEN THE DAMN TRIAL IN BOSTON'

Lisa had moved of to the far corner of the couch and looked at him shocked before standing up and walking from the room.

'Oh yeah run away now. Just awesome Cuddy.'

He slumped back into the cushions, only moving as he heard the front door slam. Groaning he rubbed his face, he had done it again, driven her away again after they had just been able to establish something. It always seemed to be like that with them. They would build a common ground and instead of trying to be happy he had to tear it apart.

Lisa had been walking along the beach for awhile and then sat down. She didn't really want to go back but she knew she had to. So after half an hour of watching the stormy sea lap at the white beach, she stood back up, brushing the sand of her.

The walk back took her much longer, halfway back the rain started pelting down and she was drenched in seconds, cold seeping through her clothes, the wind whipping at the dunes around her.

_Just, awesome. Once I decide to take a walk the weather turns. Figures._

House got worried when the rain had started and Lisa still wasn't back. She couldn't have been wearing much, the time between her storming of the room and slamming the door barely giving her time to throw on jeans and a shirt, maybe her windbreaker. He took a pill and the started pacing in front of the Living Room window which was to the sea side.

The ocean was wild, waves crashing loud, sand being blown in cascades along the beach and Greg House was walking a groove into the ground. After half an hour of waiting he decided to get outside, look out for her, he had just gotten into his windbreaker as the front door opened, a gush of cold and wet air hitting him in the front hall.

Standing in the entrance was a drenched Lisa Cuddy, hair sticking flatly to her head, face flushed, clothes hanging. He immediately limped into the guest bathroom to get her a towel, he went back to her only to be brushed off.

'Don't bother.'

Lisa walked passed him and into her bedroom, peeling out of the clothes and putting them in the tub. She turned the shower on and waited until it turned warm, starting with hand warm so she wouldn't hurt her already irritated skin. When it was to her liking she stepped into the shower, letting the rain like spray warm her up. Once she got used to the temperature she started upping it until it was steamy hot.

She almost shrieked when a wall of coldness sweeped over her as House opened the shower door and got in behind her. Almost, instead she rolled her eyes and glared at him.

'Get out.'

It sounded harsh in her own ears but she didn't want to deal right at that moment, she just wanted to warm up, wash the anger away.

'I'm sorry for flipping.'

A full blown puppy dog look attacked her, he even had the look-from-under-your-lashes-with-slightly-ducked-head down to an Wilson like art. Her shoulders slumped visibly, tension draining from her.

' I wanted, to go without the pills for longer than an hour.'

'Thats not the point Greg. The point is not what you were like this morning, that was the pain showing its ugly head. The point is that you aren't over the Boston thing and I'm not sure if you'll ever see and understand what you did to me and your friends with that lie. You might get me to forgive you, and I say forgive not forget, but what about Wilson? Or the Ducklings?.'

His eyes shifted left and right. He was thinking hard, trying to ween his way out of the situation and the responsibility. He ended up looking even more miserable.

Lisa looked at him, standing in the shower with her, reprimanded, a boy in pain. The hollow part of his thigh, the ugly scar, mangled skin. An unfortunate creature, always getting himself in such situations and being too damn proud to say he's sorry, he's made a mistake. Leaving her with the shards, to clean up, repair what he demolished.

House was just about to leave the shower when her felt her arms sneak around his waist, her front pressed neatly against his back.

'I know it's asked much, but you need to start telling me things. I want to understand.'

Turning in her arms he let her hug him.

'Sometimes I don't even know myself whats going on, how should I tell you then?'

'Just...start trusting me.'

He laid his chin onto the top of her head, hugging her back softly, just enjoying the morning shower with her. They would get better at this. They just needed to learn of their boundaries. Then they would be ok. House truly believed that, this time he would do things right with her.


	10. Chapter 10

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 10  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R (just to make sure)  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

House and Cuddy spend the rest of the day inside, the weather picture perfect for the horrible description. She had made him take his pills, suggested a time plan for the doses if he really wanted to cut down. The fear of organ failure had finally reached him and it hurt her too to see him this vulnerable. They passed their time like a normal couple, well as normal as it could get anyway. Necking, cuddling, just simply hanging out. It was a bliss House hadn't allowed himself for a long time and he was content where he was, in their own world. A world without the mess he created, without the solitude he had created for himself.

It had to end. He saw it coming, felt the dread. They had barely talked about what he did and he was thankful for that, but he knew Cuddy. Once back in the hospital everything would break around them. He was already Suspended, the board would get to know about it and maybe this time he had to face consequences and Lisa couldn't to a damn thing.

House watched her closely, cooking in the kitchen, her movements seemingly planned long ago, like everything she did. Had she planned this as well? Knew what would happen once they would be back in reality? All he could think about was how she could let herself be seen with him. Did she care enough to keep on or was thing they had strictly holidays, and more important what the heck did he want?

Lisa plopped down next to him, scrutinizing him.

'What is on your mind?'

'If I could bribe you to let me tie you to the bed.'

Harmless joking, his refuge.

'Maybe if you're really nice, until then Dinner is ready.'

She smirked and left him sitting on the couch, his mind blank, blood rushing south and eyes darkening considerably. He grinned and followed her.

'Oh you vixen!'

Slapping her ass he passed her. Giving a tiny yelp she glared at him. How could she even come close to thinking that he would get his own plate? Instead he started wolfing down his food immediately after she had put it down in front of him, not waiting for her to get seated. Cuddy gave him a cross look and shook her head more to herself then him.

'What? All that sex and necking powered me out. Need my nutrition to keep on being the Sex god I am.'

His eyes twinkled playfully and she just had to smirk back.

'Whoever said you were a sex god?'

Banter, she loved it. It made her feel complete, adored. He gave her the eyebrow, looking as if she lost her mind. Which she did last night.

'The: ' i Oh God yes Greg, right there, so damn good/i ' kinda suggested it.'

He imitated her moaning and breathy half scream from last night perfectly, making her wonder just how much of the time he had spend analyzing her. Lisa rolled her eyes and went back eating. House knew he had been good, had made her come several times the night before and made her feel like in heaven the rest of the day.

Lisa briefly wondered what really had been on his mind. His mood had been broody while she was preparing dinner. The same look she had on her face whenever she had the time to think. The same questions running through he head. What would she do? What were his intentions? Where would this lead or not lead to?

House was leering at her again, his plate cleaned and his hands resting next to it, stroking over the table top.

'You want some more?'

Cuddy was already standing up when he shook his head and made her plop back down frowning.

'I want desert.'

A suggestive and feral look, licking his lips for added effect. It made her blush furiously. He stood then and walked over to her side, taking her plate and his along and set them down into the sink. He came to stand next to her and reached for her arm pulling her up not too roughly.

'Greg what the hell...'

Lisa couldn't finish, his mouth pressed against her and his tongue stroking over hers in a soft, luring motion.

'...desert...'

It was a hasty reply as he turned them and pressed her against the table, forcing her to slide up on it. House spread her legs and then came to stand between them. Thought of hygiene ran through her head and then were swiped away as he claimed her mouth once more and leaning her so far back so that she had to lie down on the table. It felt magnificent to have him on her, his warmth and weight, his hands roaming her sides and everywhere Greg could reach, stroking and kneading. A moan that seemed oddly foreign to her made its way out of Lisa's mouth as she felt how much he wanted her pressed against her thigh.

House and Cuddy had barely made it to bed that night, each time delayed for a round of necking, on the couch, the recliner, against the bookshelf. It was almost midnight when they finally landed in bed, both panting hard, skin flushed.

'Damn woman...you know how to wear someone out.'

Greg gave her an appreciative stare down her chest and smirked even more.

'Tell me you're not only using me for the holidays.'

He hadn't thought about what it must've sounded like until Lisa gave him a confused look and then bolted from the room.

i Sorry folks for having kept you waiting I had to finish my term paper and send it in. I'm hoping to get a lot of writing down now. /i


	11. Chapter 11

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 10  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R (just to make sure)  
Summary: He went way too far

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

The night air was crisp and chilly, smelling of salt and sea grass, stars above glimmering on the endless sky. Lisa sat slumped in one of the wooden recliners gazing at the ocean and trying to figure out what was going on with her. She didn't even know what had possessed her to run from the room like she had, she only knew when he had asked she felt a deep dread to talk or even think about anything non holiday related.

It was getting colder the longer she sat in her nightgown, with no further protection from the breeze but going in right now, back to him was no option, not before she hadn't calmed her thoughts and ordered them.

What had been on his mind when he said it? Could she believe he meant it like the plea it sounded like?

_'Tell me you're not only using me for the holidays.'_

Was it that? Was she only using him for leisure time, to get away from her stressy real life where she was unable to just think about forming a relationship? Was it like Don had said?

_Am I someone else around House?_

The thought hunted Lisa. It meant she would never really be free. Free of him and the pain he inflicted. Free of him and the anger he made her feel. But also free of him and the bliss he created for them. She had never been one to be stopped easily, always pursued the goals she had set herself. Michigan grad school, being best in class, becoming Dean of medicine. But since he had tumbled into her life everything had become difficult.

House had made it hard for her, always did and always will. She still remembered their first meeting like it had been yesterday. It was decades ago, at Michigan and it had altered her life forever, sometimes making her wish it had never had happened.

**.:.flashback.:.**

The fourth semester had started just a day ago and Lisa was already so stressed that she ran late.

Bag slung over her back she ran towards the lecture hall hoping she had only missed the welcome backs the professors usually indulged in in the first week.

She criss crossed the lawn hoping to save a few seconds, she almost felt relieved until a heavy mass crashed into her full force, knocking her breath out of her and ricocheting her backwards. Lisa landed on her back, air whooshing out of her together with a string of well placed curses until she felt the dead weight land on her.

'FUCK !!! '

A male voice cursed above her.

'Were you trying to kill me you...'

She opened her eyes to glare at him making him stop his anger tirade immediately.

'Its not my fault you're too stupid to watch where you're going idiot.'

She pushed him of here roughly and shuffled to her feet. Her bag had spilled its contents and she had to collect them, trying to be as fast as possible. The guy still sat on the ground watching her as she attempted to gather everything back up.

Lisa looked over at him annoyed.

'No thanks I don't need your help.'

It was huffed and with a jerk she closed the zipper of the bag once more.

'You know the coffee on your shirt really brings out your red lace bra underneath.'

She looked down at herself horrified, a huge brown slosh soaking her shirt making it half see through. Lisa folded her arms across her chest only making him grin harder. She couldn't go to the lecture like this, but missing a lecture meant a whole lot of trouble. Her mind was racing over the possibilities as a sweater was tossed at her. Looking at him dumbfounded she found herself greeted with another smirk before he turned and got his bag and then walked away.

'You owe me coffee.'

He threw over his shoulder before breaking out in another jog, probably being late himself.

**.:.flashback end.:.**

Their first meeting, had she only known which impact he would have on her life. Sometimes finding herself thinking about how it would be if she had only been on time that day, maybe the troubles wouldn't have been as many, then shaking off such thoughts. House had also given her a lot. Not as much as he gave her trouble but still she knew wit was worth it somehow.

So what now? Was he worth giving up everything she had build over the years, for a fling, maybe more, maybe less? Should she end it or restrain whatever it was to the holidays? Would it end like it had with Stacy, with only pain and anger left behind?

Lisa sighed and put her head in her hands, shivering hard. Thinking about it made her head hurt, and if she was true to herself she didn't want to. Right now it felt right and good and earth shattering and all those other good things that come with a heated affair.

Her teeth clattered and Lisa realized she would have to go in sooner die from pneumonia. Well that considered to facing House, with all her insecurities and as he would call it stupid woman thoughts, seemed rather optimistic.

House had watched her from the patio doorway for minutes. Just observing. She was deep in thought, biting her lower lip like she usually did when a decision had to be made she didn't like making. She was shivering and rubbing her arms unconsciously, while her mind was miles away.

_'Tell me you're not only using me for the holidays.'_

It was idiotic and held a destructive streak, but that was what had made it so fitting.

_Saying it so you wouldn't have to deal with the questions yourself. Let her deal and make the decisions. Well after all you are a wuss._

Mentally slapping himself he walked towards her, deciding that he had to deal with it whatever way he could. So he softly draped a sweater he found in her drawer over her shoulders to warm her a little.

'I don't know why I bolted and I don't know where this...us...is heading or where it should be heading. I came here with every intention of ridding you from my life. So far I've just suceeded in having hours of sex with you with the usual in between fights.'

Sitting down behind her he helped her get into the sweater for the first time getting a good look at it, then breaking out into a grin.

'You still owe me that coffee you know.'

He engulfed her in a hug, making Lisa lean against his chest.

'I owe you nothing. You ran into me, ruined my shirt and made me the gossip of my semester.'

House chuckled at that. She was right, he had told everyone who saw her with his shirt that she hadn't found her shirt that morning and he lent her his after their night of abundant love making.

The girls in her semester had turned whispering each time she rounded the corner, guys whistling after her.

Lisa had been hugely annoyed, gone to him and demanded he'd clear things up. Instead she went to a football game with him, sitting next to him eating corn dogs and all the other crap she usually had stayed away from. Slowly he had weened his way into her heart and by the end of the semester they had become close friends and she felt a crush building.

'Lets stick with going day by day. I don't know what I want or need Lisa. This, us, it's comfortable, breath taking and relaxing all in one. I've forgotten how much fun we could be.'

Greg kissed her temple softly willing her and his insecurities away.

'I don't know Greg...'


	12. Chapter 12

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 12  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R (mostly for some swear words)  
Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet. The song _Hold on Tight_ by _ Rie Sinclair_ served my purposes without permission by the artist. Thanks to her for a beautiful song.

* * *

_'I have to go.'_

_'What? Why? '_

_'The kids...the patient is dying.'_

_'You can counsel them but you can't treat him.'_

_'You need to give me my license back.'_

_'I can't Greg.'_

House had thrown one of his worst tantrums ever, first trying to reason then simply attack with words. It had stung to stand before him while he threw dagger after dagger, piercing her with words and looks and with the realization that it all just been pretty until he wanted something from her. He hadn't changed a bit, still knew what would wound her the most.

Lisa hadn't been able to look at him, arms folded against her chest protectively, pulling the robe close over and over as if it could shield her from him. He had left soon after that, slamming the door on his way out, throwing his bag into the back of his car with force, driving of with screeching tires.

Numbly she had made her way to the couch and sat, for hours as it seemed to her, doing nothing but crying silently, no sounds involved. She couldn't muster the strength to get up, so Lisa stayed where she was, curled in a tight ball, staring blankly with swimming eyes.

This time he wouldn't come back to apologize. She had dared to deny him what he wanted, once more. She should've known it would be like this, should've seen it coming, it was always the same with Greg. When he left he did so by leaving you behind in shreds. He'd done it before to her, he's done it again. At least in that he was predictable.

_'You're joking right? Tell me you're joking Lisa.'_

_'The License was pulled for a reason, I can't give it back just like this. Unlike you I would have to face those consequences, the Board...'_

_'I don't give a fuck about those old bastards. My freakin' patient is dying!'_

_'It's not your patient Greg. And I give a 'Fuck' about my hospital. You did something stupid and wrong and you're being punished for it.'_

She had returned to her home a day later, not feeling up to more vacation in a house filled with memories. Now as Lisa walked into her town house it felt empty, cold and dreadful. She had to admit that she missed his presence, the way only Greg House could fill a home. His constant boredom made him almost hyperactive. He had searched the holiday house until he found things of interest only to toss them and find something new. Unveiling secrets and old stories, making her tell about the history of the place and anecdotes.

Now here Lisa stood in her chilly front hall, bag on the ground at her side, eyes closed and listening to the silence. She heaved a sigh and picked the bag up, starting her old routine.

Unpack bags, shower, get dressed comfortably, check mail, do bills, check on the hospital. Then suddenly she had done everything and nothing was left to keep her mind from wandering to House.

The house was dark besides the candles Cuddy had lit, red wine bottle on the couch table, glss nearly empty next to it, a pillow clutched close to her aching chest, as if it could pull the pain from her.

_The corners in my bedroomEmpty in the night  
I wake up waiting for you to come home  
I still believe in what we had,  
More than just a dream  
You know, the moon is shining perfectly,  
But my heart is crumbling_

Closing her eyes she could see him, feel his touch, opening them again almost killed her each time. She wanted to go to sleep so badly, wake up and forget. She knew she couldn't, once again she had allowed him to hurt her. Lisa felt like the moth flying into the light until it slowly burns. Over and over he had gotten to her. Inflicting pain because he could get his way with it.

What was the alternative? Give him the license back, get him to boast with pride and shovel herself a grave instead of waiting for the Board to do it. House simply didn't understand ramifications of the whole situation. She had to take the license or the Board would've chewed her alive.

_'This is not the right time to play Administrator Cuddy.'_

_'But the right time to forget your wrong doings and let you off the hook once more?'_

_'You can be a bitch another time, you actually don't have to kill to punish me and show me who's the boss. Tell me can you live with killing a patient just to teach me a fucking lesson?'_

_'Don't you dare make this about me Greg. I am still your boss.'_

_' That didn't stop you to fuck me on your damn kitchen table. Guess boss conscience only works one way for you.'_

_'Don't you dare call me a whore Greg'_

_'I won't Dr. Cuddy, mighty Dean of fucking medicine.'_

And now she had to accept the consequences of being the Dean of medicine once again. She couldn't be with him. Either the Board would never approve of it or House would use it against her. Knowing she should feel angered at his request but only feeling saddened of having lost what else he had provided in the few days at the ocean.

_Can I hold on tightTo the memory of you and I_

_Can I hold on to you tonight_

_And say goodbye? _

Lisa's bed was once more cold and felt huge, empty. Staring at the ceiling, not able to close her eyes, memories of previous nights haunting her. Her heart yelling at her for her stupidity, her brain reasoning that denying him was the only rational thing and it had to be done. All the while her stomach rolled and clenched, a sick feeling filling her up.

A creak downstairs, her eyes ripping open, ears perking up. Then realization. It wasn't him sneaking in again.

_Staring through my window  
Following your ghost  
Like the times I turn around and you're gone  
I still believe in what we wanted  
Much more than you think  
You know, the stars are all lit up tonight,  
But my heart is crumbling_

Lisa turned her face into the pillows to muffle the painful half scream ripping from her chest. Another night spend in tears over House. Another night she would cry until exhaustion put her to sleep.

And she'd wake up, broken and beaten, get up and put up another wall, another facade. And maybe sometime soon she'd forget this too, go on without wishing each night that he'd turn up on her doorstep, trying to win her over.

_Can I hold on tight  
To the memory of you and I  
Can I hold on to you tonight  
And say goodbye? _


	13. Chapter 13

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 13  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: R (mostly for some swear words)  
Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet. The song _ Rain _ by _ Patty Griffin_ was used without permission by the artist. Thanks to her for a beautiful song.

* * *

'Care to tell me why you are here?' 

Wilson requested while crooking his head to look at House shuffle through Cuddy's papers.

'Rhetoric question?'

One quirked eyebrow, sigh by Wilson. House one, Wilson zilch.

The shuffling stopped and Greg simply remained in his spot, sitting it out.

'Ok, care to tell me then why Cuddy is back early from her vacation, as are you?'

'She wanted the whips and hot wax, I simply wanted to cuddle.'

He added to the effect by giving his pouty look, lower lip quavering slightly. Jimmy plopped down on the couch, throwing his hands up in surrender.

'She'll kill you if she finds you in here House.'

'I'm close to it but it'll be easier just to call security.'

Sure enough Cuddy stood at the door, black pine stripe power suit, skirt ending an inch above her knees, flawless make up, 'Fuck me' High heels, and fire in her eyes. It had him semi hard almost immediately while Wilson bit his welcome back and then left the office with tail between his legs.

She hung her coat and purse, checking her cell for calls and then motioned for House with a bored wave of her hand to leave. He stayed.

'House, I have no time dealing with your 'quirks', so just leave'

She drew inverted comma's when saying quirked, shuffling through papers, definitely not looking at him. She stood next to him behind her oak desk and quick scanned the memo's. Wilson had left everything in a neat order, still she reshuffled things, simply to keep her occupied.

'I want my license back.'

'I want world peace and a cancer cure. None of that will happen soon either. Live with it.'

'I need my license to treat your precious patients, to keep donors walking in here so you can creep up their asses and get the precious money.'

'Your tantrums are getting weak House. Leave or I'll call security.'

She was royally annoyed by now. Her neckline held the flush she usually had when arguing with him, her little hands working stacks back and forth, avoiding him at all costs.

'I'll be back. This suspension will have to run out sooner or later.'

House finally left her then, hobbling from her office agitated. Cuddy slumped back in her chair rubbing her temples, a faint headache pounding behind them, surely about to get worse over the day. He was right, she snorted, no news there. He would get his license back in another week and make sure she paid dearly for her defiance.

For the past week Lisa had herself locked up in her house, thinking, crying and cursing him. By Friday she had felt utterly alone. A small part of her had hoped he'd see his mistake, come to her, they'd make up and be ok again.

_Its hard to know when to give up the fight  
Two things you want will just never be right  
Its never rained like it has to night before  
Now I don't wanna beg you baby  
For something maybe you could never give  
I'm not looking for the rest of your life  
I just want another chance to live _

House was House though, he didn't come to her place, they hadn't made up, another chance gone.

It was actually not so shocking that in this state of mind she was easily bribed into a date with someone she had met before Don. Stress at that time had her so bound that she reclined over and over but Lisa knew now was the time she needed to get out of her place, forget, let go.

House strolled through the Hospital with a superior glint to his eyes. He was back, officially, unstoppable. _Go tell it on the Mountains_

He stopped abruptly in front of Cuddy's office, thinking a detour to his route to diagnostics would do his gloating mood some good. He smirked and went into her office, sans the knocking.

'So I'm back, no thanks to you by the way, so I wanna drop in to my patient say Hi and sorry for nearly putting him in a coma, you wanna come?'

His spirits were up in stratosphere and he actually meant it more as a query to be friends with her again, putting extra cheeriness in his voice. He waited but no reply came. Cuddy simply kept writing something, not looking up.

'Ok what has a guy to do in here to get some attention?'

Now she did look up. To the clock on her desk. Cuddy then stood and went over to her coat rack, getting dressed swiftly.

'Lock the door when you leave Dr. House. I know you still have that key.'

He was left dumbfounded, staring after her. Where the hell would she be going to at this time of the day. She usually had lunch in the cafeteria, but she wouldn't need her coat for that. To say House was curious would've been an understatement, so he did what would quench his curiosity the best.

House looked through her day planner on her computer, easily hacking into it, she still hadn't changed the password. Just as easily he found out where she was.

_She sat laughing, across a fairly handsome guy, with dark curly and cropped hair, perfect white teeth, sparkling eyes and athletic build. Lisa was smiling, at him and his jokes._

_All he thought as he stood watching them through the glass window was, that it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair she was with Whitey, laughing her Cuddy laugh for him. It wasn't fair that she was doing this to him. And then he felt it, the familiar pang in his chest, a broken heart breaking again. It almost floored him, the realization hit him full force._

_He was jealous._


	14. Chapter 14

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 14  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

House walked for what seemed to him like hours, aimlessly wandering the streets while the rain pelted down on him in straight lines. He was thoroughly soaked, and lost. 

Cuddy sat down behind her desk again, her computer still on, the calendar still open. She had to swallow hard. Had she left it that way or had House found out. Frustrated she rubbed her eyes. How could she even have fooled herself with thinking that she could forget Greg? Lunch with Jeremy had been fun, but it lacked the sparkle, the deepness of her conversations with House. She had left promising to call, both knowing she wouldn't. Now she thought about going home early and take a soak in the tub then spend another night, alone, in bed , crying her heart out, then falling asleep around midnight.

A knock made her jolt.

'Come in.'

With ducked head and slow deliberate steps Wilson made his way to her desk, looking at her slightly peeved.

'You ok?'

She actually felt for him. He must've picked up on the wipe between her and House.

'Yeah, actually ...uhm. Do you have any idea where House could be? It's his first day back, he has a case and the Duck...Dr.'s Chase, Cameron and Foreman have no idea where he is. No reaction on paging him, no answer on his cell which is of, he's not at home nor in his usual hiding spots.'

He ended his sentence breathless, coming off in an actual scared tone. Wilson was worried and House's behavior was puzzling she had to admit.

'I'll let the front desk know to report whenever he makes his way back in. Until then, I can tell the security to watch out for him. He's probably just watching his stupid shows in some patients room.'

Lisa rolled her eyes for added effect, her stomach churning with an ounce of fear. Had he seen her calendar and left to do something stupid? Was it really that important to him? She didn't know nor wanted to think of it. Wilson looked at her worried.

'Jimmy...look you know how he is. He's gonna be back.'

Still she couldn't stop gnawing on her lips.

'What the hell happened between you two?'

Lisa had been waiting for the inevitable and Wilson picked up on such things. He new lovers crisis better than anyone else. He sat down opposite of her and looked at her with that I-know-what-you-feel-like-and-you-can-talk-to-me look.

'House happened.'

'What does that mean? Look, Lisa I saw him before he went to you. He was down, drank himself into delirium, because of you. And now I can't believe that you spend almost a week together without a big murder in the news and then come back and be like this.'

'He was sorry, until he wanted his license back and got nasty. Which no one will ever hear of and now please go back to your job.'

House had walked back to his apartment, it had taken him hours. His mind was somewhere else. Back at the restaurant watching her. Trying to analyze what the hell it had been that he had felt. Was it possessiveness?Simply downright dirty lust? Or something more he hadn't wanted to feel ever again after Stacy had left him? He didn't know. Peeling of his drenched clothes he showered and then went to bed, feeling weak and hot and cold at the same time.

House couldn't sleep though. He kept thinking about standing in front of the restaurant watching them. It should've been him with her, making her laugh, talking to her. It wasn't because whenever he felt like it he took his anger out on her. He should've kept his mouth shut and consulted with the Ducklings. That would've achieved more than him not being allowed to treat the patient at all.

Sometime around 2 he fell into an exhausted slumber. 

The next day House was still not in, not answering phones or pagers, and she was worried sick. By noon Lisa couldn't sit still, couldn't stop biting her lower lip or trying to reach him. This wasn't like him. He had disappeared through clinic time, but never a whole day. Not when he had an highly interesting case. Picking up the phone again she called Wilson and told him to take over for her, then she grabbed her coat and purse and left the Hospital in search for House.

House felt like a battered dog. Cold sweat clung to him, his throat was sore and his joints felt as if on fire, he couldn't keep his Vicodin down long enough because each time he swallowed something he had to retch. His day long stroll in the rain had left him with more than soggy clothes, it had also left him a severe cold.

He tried standing up again from his position next to the toilet, his world tilting only slightly this time, then tried getting back to his bed, or at least the couch. He didn't make it to either. House tried to grab for the wall, succeeding in keeping him standing a few more seconds before he slowly toppled to the floor. Groaning he rolled into a kind of ball hoping the nausea would subside.

The pounding in his head intensified, he tried squishing it by grabbing his head in both of his hands and squeezing. A knock echoed through the room and House groaned as the pain got even worse.

'HOUSE? House...open...god...please.'

Lisa leaned her head against his door. He had to be home, his bike was outside, he had nowhere else to go. She feared that something had happened to him, a fall thats hurt his leg, made him miserable.

Sighing she stretched up and got his spare key, she knew it was for emergencies only, but this seemed like one to her.

As she stepped in she was overwhelmed by the smell of puke lingering in his living room, no lights on she walked straight into his couch.

'Greg? Are you home?'

Cuddy listened carefully, silence, the dribbling of a faucet, neighbors walking up and down over her. A painful moan, a retching sound.


	15. Chapter 15

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 15  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

It had taken Cuddy almost half an hour to get House on the couch, get him a bucket and a towel and then hurry to clean up after him. Taking his temperature she felt relieved, it wasn't as high as she had expected. She checked him again, wiping his forehead with a cold washcloth.

'House?'

He could barely open his eyes, they couldn't really focus on her before he retched air again, his stomach empty long ago. Lisa rubbed his back while he heaved until he slumped back into the cushions eyes closed again.

'Just...leave.'

He rasped it out and by the way it sounded it must've been painful. Handing him a tea she scolded him with the look she gave him.

'You are not only stubborn you're stupid too House. Do you really think I would leave you here, alone, when you could be building a the fever of the decade?'

House gave her a pained look and turned his head from her, almost whimpering.

'Go, please.'

Lisa was shocked by the sincere pain in his voice._Tables turned _, as if she had been the one with the painful words. The look she gave him softened, this wasn't the time to e angry at him for what he did. He was sick already and needed help and until he was better she would try to forget what had happened.

'Look Greg whatever happened before between us is resting right now. Just let me help you and then you can be mad at me for the license thing until you get green in the face. Drink the tea its with honey and should be a small help against the sore throat until I've been at the Hospital getting some things for you.'

House's nasty snort broke the silence that had settled for a few seconds.

'Go back to white teeth...see if he wants your TLC.'

The edge in his voice was sharp, only broken by the strong rasp and the coughing that broke his words, the pain, anger, sadness and betrayal however was crisp. So he had opened her calender, followed her. Her suspicions had been right, still she didn't know if she should been angered or listen to the flutter of her heart.

'First off, it is none of your business who I see in my free time, sick enough that you read my personal calendar but following me is even worse. I wasn't the one storming off Greg, I wasn't the one behaving like a three year old with a tantrum and I was certainly not the one to try to hurt as much as possible with my words. I have no obligation to you, or what did you think? That after you get your license back I would jump back into your arms? Forget the way you treated me?'

Lisa's voice at become louder and angered, she didn't really care as he flinched because of his headache, he deserved it somehow.

'I wasn't the one jumping into someone else's arms. Hell Lisa I've always been a jackass and idiot when it came to being someone, sharing. I thought you knew, would understand me better than Stacy. I need time to adjust, we jumped into something made by anger, what did you think it was gonna be? All lovey dovey? I know I've been out of line, I know I shouldn't have said the things I said. But I did and I can't take it back. But don't pretend you wanted anything from this and then jump into bed with someone else the second I don't act like you want me too.'

They were silent for long minutes after that, both pondering the said things. Cuddy stood first, handing him his pills, silently speaking to him.

'I didn't sleep with him, he simply invited me and I needed to get out, stop thinking about you and how much I missed you and wanted you to come back. But go figure, I couldn't even enjoy it.'

She got dressed again, not looking at him and trying to hold tears of frustration back. This whole thing was messy and more than fucked up and she had no idea how they could resolve it. She turned then and walked back over to him, she leaned down slowly and softly kissed his forehead, sweat coating his almost white and hot skin. She left then, telling him to call her if he needed anything, her heart heavy and her body feeling drained of the last ounces of her strength.

It took House awhile to settle comfortably without getting sick. The headache had intensified, his head filled with jumbled thoughts since she had left him. The question that was the loudest in his inner discussion was why they could never get it to work. He knew most of it was his fault and her shitty timing. He was all rough edges and she knew, usually she dealt just fine, but when he really wanted Lisa he met her at her most vulnerable times. Times where she could not deal with his roughness and flaws. Times when she rather needed someone to hug her and help her through.

More questions raised with this. Could he and did he want to be that guy? If so did she really request him to change? Couldn't Lisa accept him the way he was? Even if she did and they tried being together, how long would it take before the next crisis shook them up?

Leaning forward he clutched his aching head and groaned. House took a pill and then laid back down for a nap, trying not to move too much too fast.

Cuddy had been back at the Hospital for about four hours, soon it would be time to leave for home. She hadn't gotten any work done while worrying over him. Always checking her watch, waiting for the phone to ring.

She jumped when it did.

Lisa had been just about to call it a night when the phone rang, making her gasp. She shook her head at the foolishness and answered swiftly. The breathing on the other line was heavy and ragged.

'Come back?'

'I'll be there in an hour.'


	16. Chapter 16

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 16  
Author: curseofavalon  
Rating: PG  
Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.

This chapter is longer and my birthday present to the sweet Prinni. Happy birthday and I hope you enjoy this day.

BTW since I have no idea about US cold medicine I had to Google it. And I have no idea if it works together with Vicodin since most cold pills here have 'soft' painkillers in them. If I killed house with a cocktail somebody might wanna tell me g.  
Pairing: Huddy  
Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

Cuddy had immediately left after getting his call. She felt somewhat relieved that he could jump over his ego and request her. It must've gotten worse, so she picked up Advil and more stuff from the pharmacy then went to a 24 hour grocery and deli store and picked up groceries for the next week. She had already cleared him of all his duties for that time at the front desk and left his Ducklings a message making clear not to disturb him with a mentally added Cameron.

After his last cold Cuddy and the hospital didn't need the repeated disaster.

When Lisa arrived back at his place it was 8, earlier then the usual time she went home at. This time House opened the door when she knocked, looking pale and barely able to keep upright. Ushering him back to the couch she made sure he was settled and then got the groceries to the kitchen.

Opening the fridge she was astounded to find it almost empty. Only a sixpack and coffee adorned the door shelves.

'Thank god I was shopping...'

Turning back to the shopping bags she jumped, Greg had somehow snuck in and was already rummaging through the bags, looking for something interesting, haphazardly putting things down left and right.

'House, go back and lie down on the couch!'

Lisa handed him a Kleenex box annoyed and tried to pick things up before they fell, apples rolling over his counter and carrots dangerously hanging over the edge.

'I don't like carrots, nor spinach.'

House made a face as he pulled the spinach from the bag, setting it close to the trash bin.

'Greg stop it! I'm trying to put this stuff away. And the food is healthy. God knows you'll need it the next couple of days. How do you even survive without food in here?'

Giving him an incredulous look she squeezed the last things into his fridge, now full to burst.

'Wilson takes care of me.'

He was slumped on the counter again, hanky in his hand, wiping his nose every few seconds.

'Meaning you're stealing his lunch still?'

Her hand moved of its own volition, softly stroking over his head. He leaned into the touch, sighing and closing his eyes. Yep, he was like all sick kids, he craved being taken care of. Briefly she wondered if his mother had ever done that for him, or if his father had always stopped all shows of affection towards the boy. Lisa had met his parents and had gotten her share of stories already back in University.

'He's paying for me.'

It ripped her from her thoughts and made her chuckle.

'I thought about making soup, is that ok with you?'

Greg nodded and looked at her spend, the moving to the kitchen and talking had taken up his last energy resources.

'Go back and lay down, I'll bring you tea?'

He shook his head and put it back down on his folded arms on his work bench.

'Wanna watch, 'm bored.'

If Lisa would've cooked after what he wanted in the soup they would've had hot water with letter noodles. Greg was against carrots, beans and not really fond of not having any chicken in it. He ate the soup anyways, his stomach had been grumbling all the time and she guessed he hadn't eaten the whole day.

'You up to telling me how you sported that cold?'

Handing him Advil and hand checking his temperature again, she looked at him inquiring. He shrugged weakly.

'Was taking a walk.'

Simple as that.

'Before or after you followed me?'

A snort, followed by extensive nose blowing and use of 4 kerchiefs. Lisa knew he wouldn't answer, she also suspected that he had taken a day long stroll after seeing her with Jeremy, it would explain why they couldn't reach him.

After clearing the table and doing the dishes Cuddy checked up on him again. He was on the couch, zapping.

'Good I guess you're settled. If anythings up give me a call, ok?'

Greg's eyes shot up to hers, his were red and heavy lidded, nose red, cheeks fallen. He looked better than at her first visit though.

'Can't you stay?'

The small child again.

'I'm not sure thats a good idea Greg.'

'Please...?'

Lisa ended up staying, in his bed, since he told her the story of Wilson and the couch.

'I'll get ill just like you.'

She laid on her side facing away from him. Instead of saying something 'House like' he spooned her, his breathing warm against her neck. She sighed, it was still bliss, feeling as if she was floating when she was in his arms.

'You're trying to weasel back into my good books.'

House kissed her neck then, slightly open mouthed.

'Is it working?'

A hoarse whisper, crackling with held back coughs.

'Not when you're sick Greg.'

'Spoilsport.'

A last kiss to the nape of her neck and then he snuggled her close once more.

Lisa laid awake for another half another, listening to his rattling breathing. His embrace was warming her to the core, almost making her forget. What should she do? How should she react? _Forgive!_, her heart screamed while her brain send alarms.

_'He was down, drank himself into delirium, because of you.'_

She sighed and then turned to him pressing her face into his solid warm chest.

'I thought you'd never turn around.'

'Shut up you stupid git.'

It was mumbled against his neck, his arms tightening around her. Greg kissed her forehead softly and she could feel him smile. She punched his chest gently, groaning with frustration.

'I hate you for doing this to me.'

' But you still want it.'

Lisa sighed but her hands stroked his side still. He was right. It was as if she had this masochistic streak. She couldn't stop wanting him.

'Goodnight Greg.'

Kissing his chest was the last thing she remembered before falling into a deep slumber, the first night since they returned that she fell asleep at all.

House woke up in the middle of the night sweating hard, feeling sick, he groaned, then tried to stand. He needed to get to the bathroom, fast. Before he could stumble out of the bed he felt Lisa helping him sit and hold the bucket under his face so he could throw up.

Afterwards she stood up and got cold washcloths, wiped his forehead of the cold sweat, mumbling to him to lay back down. Lisa got him water and and helped him drink before checking his temperature again. Only slightly high, she'd make sure to check repeatedly.

He was beside her, panting, trying to regain normal breathing.

'Are you ok?'

She whispered, rubbing his tummy slowly remembering her mom always doing that when she had felt sick. She was right, he turned more into the touch and Lisa rolled onto her side to have a better angle.

'Peachy.'

'Try to sleep Greg.'

Stroking sweaty hair of his forehead she waited until he had slumbered off, then allowed herself some more sleep.

Morning sun tickled him awake and the first thing House felt was his burning throat as he swallowed and the dull headache as well as white hot pain in his thigh. He turned to his nightstand to fish for his pills when he saw that Lisa had already arranged everything for him. His Vicodin, an Advil, a glass of water reminding him not to dry swallow, steaming tea and on the ground a cleaned bucket.

Taking his pills he tried to listen for any suspicious sounds. Lisa must be in the kitchen from the sound and smell coming from there. He slowly grabbed the tea and inhaled. Honey and cough bonbon's he obtained from Germany. He remembered those from when he was a kid and his Dad was stationed in the western sector of Berlin, which was enclosed by eastern Germany. A friend from his Dad knew someone in the eastern part and for cigarettes they got Kruegerol cough bonbon's. Dropping them into hot tea and drinking it, even if he wasn't sick was his favorite way to drink tea and his mother swore that it was the only way to get tea into him when he was a kid.

He took another smell and almost had to smile. Still like then, same smell, same taste. He went out of his way to order those packs, and right now, as he drank the hot tea and the herbs from the bonbon's laid over his aching throat and stilled it together with the honey he was grateful he did and he was grateful that Lisa had found them.

'Good morning.'

She stood in the door way, his huge robe wrapped around her small frame, hair tousled and frilly but eyes brighter than ever. And he had to admit that seeing her standing in his apartment like that felt right and all too normal.

'Hey Florence.'

House rasped and set the now empty mug on the nightstand. He looked up at her again, outlined by the morning sunlight spilling from his living room and this time he did smile, crooked and long been unused but still a smile.

'Feelin' better?'

Her voice was hoarse with sleep and still she had been up already to make breakfast. Lisa walked over and crawled back into bed, House opened his arms and let her nestle against him.

'Sickness is gone, aching throat and cold stuff still there.'

Greg kissed the crown of her head and his hands skimmed over her sides.

'Ugh...since when are you so cheery in the morning? You're sick, you should be grumpy.'

It was muffled against his neck and made him chuckle, which resolved in coughs.

'Maybe I'm stoned and maybe I'm just ...lets say delighted, because happy would be too big for me, that you have stayed with me.'

Lisa looked up at him, searching for honesty, and found him dead serious. He really meant it. He was 'delighted' because she was with him. Her heart did a triple backflip /flutter and her cheeks flushed bright red. She ducked her head so he wouldn't see, but this particular morning he would have none of it. Greg tilted her chin up and kissed her cheek tenderly. She gave him a questioning look at that.

'Still sick, you don't want to end up like me, and I need my Florence to take care of me. Don't get me wrong you immobilized not able to yell at me is a nice thought, But all the healthy stuff in my fridge needs to be cooked and frankly, I'm not gonna do it.'

It made Lisa chuckle, the simplicity of his thinking and she snuggled back and kissed his throat.

'I made some breakfast. Pudding as you requested last night.'

'Vanilla?'

She nodded and showered his neck with kisses, her hand stroking circles over his churning stomach.

His hands were wandering up and down her back and he was smiling softly.

'You made Vanilla pudding, just for me?'

'You asked for it. And it's easier to eat anyways.'

Lisa shrugged nonchalantly and rolled away from him again, stretching on the bed before getting up.

'Hey...come back.'

She laughed as he started pouting and grabbed his hand helping him out of bed, then handing him his cane. Huffing House walked past her and she took the chance to pinch his boxerbrief glad rear.

'C'mon breakfast is turning cold.'

He shook his head and chuckled.

They sat together at the Island counter in the kitchen longer than needed, just talking to each other. It was refreshing for both of them, making Lisa feel as if she had never really slept and lived before. By ten she went back to the hospital checking that everything was in order and deciding to take some of the work home that night. Trying to work through the pile of papers and folders as fast as possible and then trying to clear her clinic hours while supervising the Ducklings for House.

'Where is House, Dr. Cuddy?'

To say that Cameron was annoying was an understatement and she came to understand House's short temper around her.

'He's sick, I left you a message. Now could we please get on with work. Dr. Foreman report to Dr. Chang up in Neurology. Dr. Chase I'd like to send you to NICU again and Dr. Cameron...wait...'

She shuffled through the request sheet and tried to think of a place where Cameron could do less harm.

'...Radiology needs help.'

Yeap, Job done. Radiology, no why she could care someone to dead there. Lisa was just about to leave when she was stopped once again.

'How is Dr. House doing?'

'He is fine. It's just a cold, he'll be back soon to harass you guys.'

'Maybe I should go over and check that he has everything. God knows he never goes grocery shopping, He usually snags one of Chase's sandwiches.'

'Don't worry Dr. Cameron I am quite sure he is well taken care of. Now if you guys would please go do your jobs.'

Cuddy could finally leave, knowing that Cameron would not let up until she went over to see he was doing fine and knowing she'd be eaten alive by sick and grumpy House. To make sure he was brought some food for Lunch she asked Wilson to check up on him.

'So...you two...?'

'I went over because he asked me to James.'

She rolled her eyes for emphasis, he was nosy as twelve cheerleaders.

'Am I gonna find a bag with overnight stuff there?'

And perceptive as a bitch.

'No, I'll bring that tonight. Please make sure he eats something healthy?'

It was almost sounding like a beg and Lisa knew that Wilson would try. As she looked up again he was smirking at her, one eyebrow raised.

'What?'

'You're staying at his place?'

'He's sick James. He's asked for help.'

'And your heart is to good to be true around him, I know, I know. I don't have to ask if you're sleeping on the couch right?'

She made a face then, remembering what House had told her and even if it hadn't been Wilson's fault, there was no was she was sleeping on that couch nor sit on that side.

'What?'

His turn to ask.

'Nothing...just a bit nosy of you don't you think Dr. Wilson? Or are you questioning my authority?'

'By what House told me I don't have to question that.'

_Touché _ , it made her blush and shrug.

'Go, he's probably waiting for Lunch.'


	17. Chapter 17

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 17

Author: curseofavalon

Rating: PG

Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.

BTW since I have no idea about US cold medicine I had to Google it. And I have no idea if it works together with Vicodin since most cold pills here have 'soft' painkillers in them. If I killed house with a cocktail somebody might wanna tell me g.

Pairing: Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

Companionable silence stretched over then two man as the munched on their lunch and watched TV. Wilson had bought a Reuben Sandwich for House and a salad for himself since House argued that if Wilson ate a salad it was healthy enough for both of them and Cuddy couldn't say a thing.

'So, how did you get Cuddy to forgive you?'

Greg smirked wistfully at the younger man.

' I am that good Jimmy.'

It made Wilson grin. His two friends seemed to be on a better road with each other and maybe with some help here and there they would actually be able to make it work out for them.

'She coming over tonight?'

'Yeap, told her there is more where last nights instant happiness came from.'

His voice was nasal and roughened by a sore throat and James was sure Cuddy didn't let him near her. The woman was anal with fear of sickness. Leaving her precious Hospital baby alone again after her longish holidays, lets say he didn't believe it. He looked at House thoroughly and was astonished by how happy he seemed. As if he could take on the world and it reminded him of a time when Stacy had still been there, early in there relationship. He was truly happy for House.

'You really like her.'

'Yea especially the funbags.'

'No I mean you really try. You even want her close.'

'She's awesome in bed sure I want her close.'

'You know what I'm talking about.'

Greg looked over and pondered silently. He wanted her close, needed her and it didn't feel wrong or cramped. It felt relieving to find his pills in the morning, lined up with a class of water. It was refreshing to see her in his robe, nothing underneath, walking through his apartment like she lived there, knowing where everything was. Waking up in the morning and have her soft skin against his was a goal he had started to set himself. Still he couldn't admit it to Wilson. Greg needed no gloating from Jimmy, just silence and understanding so he shrugged nonchalantly.

It was late when Lisa parked her car in his street. A late meeting had been called and then she had to take care of some last minute orderings and after that getting an overnight bag together. She dropped the second set of his key on his phone table and then put her bag down next to the door. Something was wrong but Cuddy couldn't pinpoint it. The apartment was dimly lit, Bluesy tunes wafted over from his stereo and some strange yet pleasing smell came from the kitchen.

'Greg? I'm home.'

This time she didn't flinch when saying home. He had referred to their places as 'Home' early on.

'Kitchen.'

As she stepped into the rather tiny than spacious room she was surprised to find House bend over the stove stirring something.

'You're cooking Dinner?'

'No my underwear...'

He rolled his eyes then tasted whatever he had simmering. After setting her handbag down she walked up to him hugging him from behind and looking past him at the stove.

'Is that clamshell soup?'

'Yes, my Mom's receipt.'

He blew air on the spoon with some soup and then held it to her to taste. She moaned when the liquid rolled across her tongue setting off sparks in her taste buds. It was an exquisite mix of soft creamy mixed with spicy tastes. He took a spoonful himself and then turned to her and kissed her tenderly.

'You like?'

Lisa nodded and smiled, not being able to be mad at him for kissing her. She had missed his soft but firm caresses all too long, her body on fire as soon as he stepped so close to her that she could smell his cologne. He hugged her tight, swaying softly and humming to the Blues music while the soup kept cooking.

'I love dancing with you Cuddy. You fit me perfectly, curves and hollows in all the right places. Soft skin, firm muscles...'

Trailing of House looked down at her and then kissed her forehead not wanting her to see all of the underlying emotion. She pressed her face into his chest smiling, her arms firm around his waist.

'Thanks for cooking.'

'Its me saying thanks for, ya know, taking care of me. Caring.'

Stepping onto her tiptoes Lisa kissed him, smiling, her hands framing his face.

After Dinner House sat with Cuddy at his Piano, playing whatever she suggested with the glee of zealous child, the tunes almost playful. She gazed at his long fingers, shudders running up and down her spine as she imagined those long and lean fingers dancing along her skin to a song only he could hear.

He ended yet another song, his hand coming to rest on her knee, squeezing tenderly. Her eyes were closed and she licked her lips before turning to him and opening her eyes again. House's stare was fixed on her supple lips. His own hand wandered higher on her skirt glad leg, stroking over her thigh, goosebumps forming almost immediately.

Lisa turned into the caress, enabling him to reach under her skirt, a soft gasp escaped her as he stroked a fingertip up the sensitive inside of her inner thigh, her whole being lightning up on fire. Her hand was pressed against his neck, feeling his pulse speeding up, then pulling him down to kiss her deeply, throwing all caution to the wind. She wanted and needed him.

It made Greg smile how her body seemed to hum with excitement whenever he came close to one of her spots. One hand still under her skirt and the other unbuttoning her blouse, her mouth firmly working against his, tongues swirling, the soft and wet texture intoxicating. He moaned into her mouth as her teeth gazed his lower lip and her hand landed on the bulge in his jeans.

Cuddy squeezed him and grinned as he almost jumped. He was hot and hard under her hand, pulsing with desire for her and she intented to taste out this night to the fullest, make up for the lost week. She had his zipper down fast and her hand sneaked into his jeans taking him into her hand, massaging just with the right amount of pressure. It had him groaning and writhing.

Greg had to rip his mouth from hers as he grunted out his please when Lisa set her nails against his length. He wanted her and was sure that if he let her torture him further he would have a Technicolor repeat of his early adolescence.

'Lisa...please, I want you.'

She nodded and pulled her hand from his jeans so they could stand. Already turning to leave for the bedroom she was astonished when he pressed her against the piano and smirked.

'I always thought about doing you on my piano.'

It made Lisa's heart stop and then start racing, the thought alone, of lying on the polished surface, almost made her come and she knew that she wouldn't get much sleep that night.


	18. Chapter 18

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 18

Author: curseofavalon

Rating: R

Summary: turning points

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.

Pairing: Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

The alarm rang loudly at seven and Lisa slapped it into snooze groaning tiredly. As soon as she opened her eyes and took in her surroundings, remembering where she was, a smile broke out on her face. She stretched, feeling the aches in all the right places. Greg lay next to her snoring gently, untroubled by the alarm, a smirk prominent on his lips. She leaned over and kissed his cheek before rolling out of bed and sauntering into the bathroom and getting ready for work.

Half an hour later Cuddy was preparing breakfast when House strolled in slumping in to the chair across the table. She set coffee before him and half of her sandwich.

'Morning.'

Before she could round the table again Greg had her pulled onto his lap sideways, kissing her deeply.

'Morning Cuddles.'

After pecking him once again she stood up and gathered her things.

'Are you going to be here for lunch today?'

It wasn't that he hadn't enjoyed time with Wilson but he hoped for a little more than a sandwich for Lunch and he told her with a lecherous glance down her top.

'I can't. I have a board meeting about finances.'

'You would be there rather than being with me?'

A pout with quivering lip almost had her undone, she turned away at the right moment and pulled on her coat. He stood, looking down at her smirking.

'C'mon Lisa, you know you want to.'

Cuddy walked backwards while House kissed her, sucking at her lower lip, his teeth grazing her tongue, hands squeezing her hips. Somehow she succeeded in steering him to the door, with a fast move she grabbed for the doorknob behind her and turned it, the door opening wide.

'Oh my God!'

Somewhere in his fuzzy brain House registered that it could not have been Cuddy uttering the words due to the fact that her lips were pressed firmly to his. But what really gave it away was that it sounded a lot like his female protégé Dr. Cameron.

Lisa jumped in his arms, eyes wide and swollen lips half open while House looked at the young woman in his door annoyed. Cameron held a deli bag in one hand and two coffee's in the other.

'Thanks for bringing me and Lisa breakfast but we already ate.'

Cuddy stood stock still, Cameron flinched and then blushed and House groaned.

'I am sorry Dr. Cuddy, I only wanted to bring Dr. House some food since he's been sick and...'

Trailing off she finally looked up at her two superiors feeling more than ashamed.

She sat hiding in her office for most of the day, ashamed that Allison Cameron had seen them in such a compromising position, the only one of the Ducklings Lisa knew couldn't be dealt with. She waited for the younger Dr to burst into her office screaming 'bloody murder', half expected one of her colleagues barge in, annoyed at infinite grumpyness and tantrums. None of that happened however, which told her House had somehow taken care of it.

The question left was if she would like the way he dealt with it. She jolted as it knocked, she had her office blinds drown but knew that the intimidated knocking could only come from one puppy oncologist. Sighing she went to the door and unlocked it then swung it wide open, leaving Wilson look shocked on the other side.

'What?!'

It made him duck and flinch.

'I just wanted to know if it already reached you?'

Lisa felt a twitch of fear, had she heard what? Had House done something in clinic? Apparently Wilson wasn't about to answer since he was staring intently at his shoes.

'Well what is it?'

'2 hours ago Cameron and House started a screaming match, which Cameron lost. She's in clinic now and frankly she scares the patients. The rest of House's staff try to avoid him and he is somewhere but not in his office.'

She sighed and let herself slump down into the cushions of her couch. Rubbing her face warily she tried to imagine what House could've said and how many people could've heard. It was a nightmare.

'You want to know what this was all about ?'

Jimmy sat down in an armchair and looked at her with a smirk behind a pitiful stare.

'We both know that I know what the screaming was about.'

She answered with a snort. Wilson tried the encouraging smile.

'So it's true then? Cameron found you two making out as she knocked on House's door?'

She could've killed him. He knew it was true, he knew all along an still he asked stupid questions.

'What do you think? Even Cameron doesn't make such stuff up. How many people heard?'

He touched her shoulder reassuring.

'Don't worry he told her to keep it down or there would be consequences. I only witnessed because I was there to bring him a patients file.'

To say Cuddy was relieved was an understatement.

Cameron had just cleared another patient and wanted to leave for her coffee break. She threw away what she had used in the exam room and then washed her hands. As she was just about to turn and leave the door opened and then clicked shut.

'No patients, wait outside until you're told which exam room.'

Allison was annoyed to hell with patients and their forwardness and especially their almost non existent deadly deceases.

'Is this how you talk to possible patients?'

She turned abruptly to see Cuddy leaning against the door. Huffing she went back to scrub her hands again, Cuddy was the last person she wanted to see.

'You want to tell me Dr Cameron why several complaints have been filed against you?'

Lisa didn't think to get an answer but what made her even more angry was that she had to talk to the younger womans back. It was rude and no way to treat your superior.

'I think we have some talking to do Allison.'

Once again Cameron turned, mind set on walking out on Cuddy, until she noticed that the Dean of Medicine had locked the door behind her back.


	19. Chapter 19

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 19

Author: curseofavalon

Rating: PG

Summary: Can they make it or will the past intervene?

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.

Pairing: Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

The talk had lasted half an hour, ending with Cameron fuming inside rather than outside but having been set straight. Cuddy still couldn't believe how far this infatuation with House had been nourished by the young Dr. . It had hurt Cameron deeply to find House and her kissing this morning and maybe Cuddy could understand, being reminded of herself years ago when she had found House with Stacy.

That day, that memory had left her with a deep and slow ache. But with time came healing and it would be the same with Dr. Cameron. She had left the younger woman with and understanding look offering her peace and an open mind, hoping that the problem would somehow resolve itself now.

_ 'Why doesn't he see me?' _

The last Question Cameron had asked. A lot of answers. Sure House was proud to be swooned over by a woman her age. Who wouldn't be, that had been Wilson's problem all along. But thats all that interested House in Cameron. Besides that they hadn't had much in common. Not that Lisa and he had, but she understood him better than anyone, she's been there, she's done it all and with it came the understanding of his pain and behavior. That would always between House and Cuddy, and if the rest of the world broke around them, if the friendship and maybe love would leave them they would still have that eternal understanding of the other.

Lisa doubted, that even if House would've started anything with his protégé it would last or be pretty if they went separate ways.

When arriving back in her office she simply slumped down on the couch, pulled of her shoes and then laid down, groaning. Stress somehow always doubled when House was involved.

'You had a little chat with the little minion?'

Gasping she looked up, his shadow looming over her.

'You broke into my office! Again?'

House pushed her legs of the couch to make space for himself but instead of leaving her laying crooked he pulled her feet back onto his lap in an almost gentle gesture.

'Does it really still surprise you or do you just act that to keep up the cool administrator facade?'

He stroked her calves softly then let his hands travel further south to massage her stressed feet making her purr with contentment.

'Mmmmhhh...what do you want House?'

'Why should I want anything?'

'You doing something for me on your own free will?'

Raising her eyebrows, not buying it. She could almost hear him smirk, his voice filled with haughtiness.

'I believe I do a lot for you, better to say I do a lot you.'

Lisa snorted at that but the snort was broken when he pressed the sole of her foot pulling a deep moan from her.

'Actually...I do need something from you.'

'I KNEW IT!!!!!'

She pulled her legs of his lap sharply, almost hurting him on the way, sat up and looked at him sharply.

'All this schmoozing around just because you want something, Thanks a lot you keep making my day.'

Before she could stand House grabbed her wrist tenderly and pulled her back down.

'Would you just listen before you bolt? Not that I don't like you strutting away from me.'

It was accompanied by his trademark smirk.

'I was only about to ask you if you could clear your weekend.'

'Why?'

Cuddy was definitely confused by his odd behavior now.

'Well maybe I had planned for us to go somewhere.'

House shuffled his feet nervously and stared them into submission. It made her smile tenderly and lean against him.

'So...you plan on a little get away?'

Was he blushing? No, but if she kept pressing he'd bolt.

'I just thought it would be nice to spend a weekend together without the Hospital or it's staff always getting in the way. We could go back to the coast, you'd only have to clear your Saturday and I wasn't intending to go to work anyways.'

Seriously rambling he stopped and caught his breath before looking at her like a 13 year old schoolboy asking a girl to a dance.

'I'll see what I can do ok?'

House nodded and then let go of her hand. The gentle moment definitely gone.


	20. Chapter 20

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 20

Author: curseofavalon

Rating: PG

Summary: Can they make it or will the past intervene?

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome.

Pairing: Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

The drive to her cabin had been uneventful the only times they stopped were toilet or gas stops and they made it in 3 hours to the coast.

The weather up there was almost nice, only the warmth was missing, besides that the sun shone through between huge cumulus clouds, highlighting patches of seaweed, sandy dunes and parts of the rocky and rough coastline left to the Cuddy's House. As Greg got out of the car he took a deep breath of the rich air surrounding him, trying to grab all the different smells and keep them in his memory. It smelled of clean water, grass ad wet sand mixed with the usual whiff of salt. Over them seagulls were making their rounds, screaming and taking turns in crashing towards the shore and then dropping down.

Lisa was already on the back of the car opening the trunk and starting to get things out, heaving a sigh as she lifted bag after bag out of the car. Quickly turning to her he made his way over and selected a bag h could sling over his shoulder easily.

'Can you put the things aside I can get in?'

'You want to help me?'

She was surprised, watching his retreating back as he made his way onto the porch and to the door.

'Keys?'

No answer from him. _Could've known that_ . Grabbing her duffel she followed him and opened the screen door, then unlocked the front door and made space so he could shuffle in. Lisa watched him, her head cocked to the side.

'You sure it's not too heavy?'

'I'm not Wilson Lisa, I won't drop down crying.'

He snorted and dropped the bag in the front hall then went out to get more. No way he could get up the stairs with a bag slung over his shoulder. She would have to carry it up. Still he helped her and she was astonished as to why he was so changed.

'You sure you didn't destroy the new MRI?'

She asked him that while passing him on her way out. Feeling insecure around this new House.

'You sure you wear a B-cup and not an A?'

Slapping his shoulder she dropped the subject and helped him silently get the things in, then carry what belonged into the bedroom up. When finished she started unpacking for them while Greg stored the fridge downstairs.

'Hey Lisa, you want some coffee?'

Grumbling she dropped his socks in the dresser. Now he wanted coffee, he could at least wait until she was done with unpacking before he forced her to make his coffee.

'I'll make some when I'm done here.'

Cuddy yelled back down in her best: I'm-the-administrator-don't-get-me-angry voice.

'I asked you if I should make you some.'

His voice was soft and close, turning she saw him leaning against the door frame of the bedroom, looking at her amused. She heaved a sigh and dropped her head a little, blushing with shame of having assumed the worst of him again. Sitting down on the bed he pulled her down next to himself.

'Tell me whats going on? This is supposed to be relaxing for us both Lisa.'

'I'm not used to you being gentle.'

Scoffing she held back the urge to punch his shoulder frustrated.

'So you're annoyed when I'm me, but when I put in some afford you're even more annoyed?'

House couldn't hold back his chuckle. She was so easily confused, it would almost be too easy to be an ass with her again.

'I guess I just need to unwind, the week was stressy.'

Leaning against him Lisa heaved another sigh and tried to relax her back and shoulders with concentrating on the movement of his hand. It pressed into her back softly and then stroked in upwards circles from lower back to shoulders, leaving her almost purring.

'This weekend is planned as relaxing away from everything and everyone hospital. So shut off your cell and let us relax. I want you for myself these three days.'

House was sincere with what he said, he planned this to spend time with her exclusively and Lisa felt honored.

Leaning up she tenderly kissed up his neck to his jaw, nibbling on its scrubby underside before kissing to his ear and softly biting his earlobe. He groaned, a deep rumble in his chest, and squeezed her shoulder in encouragement. Smirking Lisa pulled away and stood again, looking at him sweetly, his eyes glazed over, his mouth half open.

'I'd love coffee.'

They sat huddled together on the swing couch on the porch, blankets wrapped around them, wind making the wind chimes compose little songs. Lisa's head was tucked under his chin, his hands surrounding her in a warm embrace, making her feel more than secure.

House's gaze was fixed on the ocean, staring on as the salty, rough sea ate at the sandy shoreline with loud grumblings. The air smelled distinctively like rain, mixing with his male, soapy smell.

Lisa smiled softly and closed her eyes just enjoying the closeness, the smell and the sound. Greg kissed her temple softly, his arms tightening around her as another breeze washed over them.

'Maybe we should get back in. It's getting pretty cold.'

'No, please. Just a little longer.'

Cuddling closer to him she pressed her nose against his chest inhaling deeply. For the first time in weeks she felt thoroughly relaxed, as if floating. She softly stroked over his flat tummy , under his shirt, relishing in the feeling of his warm skin and fine downy hair forming his happy trail.

Goosebumps formed on his flesh, his breath shaking, as he gazed down at her. Her cheeks were rosy from the soft but cold breeze, hair frilly from a day driving. She was dressed in comfy Jeans and a blue wool sweater, which highlighted her eyes even more.

His eyes closed for a brief moment as he enjoyed her attention, until he felt her lips on his collar bone and his eyes ripped open from surprise. A moan soon fell from Greg's lips, his head rolled back and his hands landed to tangle in her hair.

'Lisa... .'

Another moan and he pulled her onto his lap slowly, making sure she stayed of his mangled thigh. His lips fused to hers in a slow and sexy caress, his hand grabbing at her hips.

'Greg...wait...not here.'

Lisa tried to get away from him but his lips were relentless. His hands moved under her pullover fast and framed her slim ribcage, another shudder running through him at the skin on skin contact.

Again she broke their heated kiss, leaning her forehead against his, panting heavily.

'Not here, your thigh.'

'I don't care...'

He pressed her down on his groin and moaned as she rubbed against him in a hard and long stroke. She faltered and moaned in unison with him, her body warming considerably. Gazing into his eyes she smiled tenderly, while steadily circling her hips, her head falling back as his hands came to rest on her lace glad breasts and massaging the globes softly.

'Oh god...'

'Hey where did you put the Chocolate Trifle we picked up at my favorite bakery?'

His head and upper torso were half way into the fridge, as he rummaged through the contents.

'Upper shelf Greg. Hand me the Steaks?'

They had always worked well together. They did even better at homely things, as long as Lisa was cooking. He handed her whatever she requested, in between taking time to steal kisses and when the Steaks were done and the potatoes still needed a couple of minutes, he had her pressed against the counter in a heavy make out session.

It came over Greg whenever he was close to her. Since he was with her he felt younger than ever, refreshed and alive. And his intention was to pay her back the best way he could. House couldn't promise Cuddy a normal relationship, not only due to the fact that she was still his superior, but he would make sure to show her at least at home how much she made him feel.


	21. Chapter 21

Titled: Pain in my heart chapter 20

Author: curseofavalon

Rating: R

Summary: Can they make it or will the past intervene?

Authors Note: comments, reviews and critique are very welcome. Thanks to lj user"wanderlonely" for the shirt idea.

Pairing: Huddy

Disclaimer: I don't own House or its characters Fox does tho, I just used them shamelessly for this snippet.

* * *

House woke with a start as a cool breeze swept through the window and over him, leaving him freezing. He pulled the comforter tighter around him and turned to Cuddy's side, intent on cuddling her close but was only able to grab for an empty pillow.

Groaning he rolled over once more and gazed at the door, it was slightly ajar and light from the hallway was pouring into the bedroom. Minding his leg, Greg got up and grabbed his cane, which was hooked onto his nightstand, and fished his boxers from the ground with it so he could get them on.

He found his lover in the kitchen, pack of milk in one hand, glass in the other. That wasn't what he saw first though.

His eyes took a hungry glint as his heated gazed traveled up her silken legs, then over her almost nude body, nipples perking from the cold, hair spilling over her shoulders in wild waves. She was wearing his blue, rumpled dress shirt, only one button closed. The sight made him think dirty thoughts, and he smirked.

_ Yep he was definitely whipped _

Actually House liked every second of it. He would feel like dead and gone to heaven if Cuddy would agree to always wear this attire. The shirt not being able to conceal her nipples at all, letting him see just enough delicious skin and breast to feel more and more blood rushing south.

'You going to stand there longer or actually come over here?'

Lisa's voice held an erotic tone and he groaned as he almost ran to her, crashing his lips against hers feverishly. Their tongues entwined in a fierce wet battle, his hands grabbed at her, under his shirt, his calloused hands stroking over her sensitive breasts, making her moan and shiver. Before he could drive her behind rational thought, Lisa broke the kiss and pushed him to lean against the Island counter, making quick process of his boxer brief's. Before he knew what was happening to him, she was kneeling before him giving him a sassy smile before getting them a midnight treat.

It was ten when Cuddy woke, surrounded by a comforting warmth, a heavy arm draped over her midriff, stroking her belly ever so softly. She had to smile instantly as she remembered their previous night and it's activities. They had this kind of routine now, and in between routine tasks it was a red, hot and sexy something she wasn't able to fully describe. House could do incredible things to her and made her do things she never thought that she, Lisa Cuddy, was capable of doing. She could feel him shift, his straining morning erection pressed into her back, jumping promisingly as she wriggled against him.

'You're killing me woman...'

It had her smiling, the way his voice hitched while she pressed more firmly against him, how she could feel him respond against her, his shaft thickening and hardening more. With a moan House pressed his lips against her bare shoulder, scorching her with his demanding kisses.

'Mmmmh, I'm hungry House.'

'Just what I wanted to hear.'

With one swift movement he had her pinned on her back, under him and smirked down at her before pressing his member against her core. It forced a gasp from her, made her arch her back towards him and a purr rise in her chest. She was gorgeously wet and soft against him and House almost came from that feeling alone.

'Damn Cuddy.'

Was all that House could force out before pushing into her in one, long and deep stroke.

' I can't believe it. I should've known it was to good to be true. You wanting to help me and all.'

Chuckling Lisa put a plate filled to the brim with scrambled eggs before him and chuckled.

'Hey if I remember last night correctly I helped you a lot. A breakfast isn't asked too much eh?'

'I guess.'

Blushing to the roots of her hairs as she thought about what had happened only hours earlier on the kitchen table they now sat at. House smirked again.

'Nice visual? See me pounding into you whenever you close your eyes?'

'See me kneeling before you whenever you look at the counter Greg?'

She wore a smirk of her own. Her foot had somehow made it into his lap, making sure that he remembered just how much fun he had had.

'Little sex kitten.'

'Grumpy old nymphomaniac.'

'As if you don't enjoy that Dr do-me-harder Cuddy.'

'Say's the right person Mr I-can't-pass-you-by-without-getting-hard House.'

They both looked up at the same time from their plates, grinning from ear to ear, then went back to their morning routine as the moment passed.

The weekend had passed in a flash, but left both Doctors relaxed to no ends. House even whistled as he prepared a sandwich for them Sunday night at his place.

'You know we should've just stayed at the cabin.'

'We both have a job to do House.'

'I'd much rather do other things.'

Waggling his brows he tried to look alluring, Cuddy only rolled her eyes though before chuckling.

'We have enough time after work.'

'Not enough in my opinion.'

She nodded sympathetic, really understanding him. Spending time apart from Greg was starting to affect her.

'We're ok though?'

House leaned over and kissed her tenderly, then nodded.

'You know I'm an old grumpy idiot. I'm just bitching.'

She kissed him back softly and smiled genuinly.

'I should get going, have to get in early tomorrow.'

'Can't you stay?'

'I have an early meeting tomorrow Greg. I'm sorry but I really can't stay.'

The parting took them almost an hour. House wouldn't let Cuddy go easily, putting up a hard fight, in the end having to let her go reluctantly, having her promise a treat for good behavior.

The next morning House made it to work only an hour late, not having been able to sleep anyway.

He was set on getting his treat for being earlier than usual right away, strutting towards her office, a dangerous glint in his eye. Due to the fact that he was plotting what to demand of Cuddy he never noticed the meaningful stares and whispers behind hands that was guided towards him at the nurses station.

With a flourish he threw her door open, oblivious to the look she gave him, raising his arms at his sides.

'I'm an hour too early, I want a treat.'

When that gave him no reaction he looked down at her. Her face was not laughing or angered, she ws biting at her lower lip and glancing at something before her. Looking at the same direction he saw someone was sitting before Cuddy.

'Ooops did I run into your Call Girl hour again?'

'Greg...'

She was worried to death about something, his face shifted from banter to confusion. The person in the chair turned and his heart stopped beating as he saw who made his way to Princeton Plainsboro.

'You...!'


	22. Chapter 22

_ 'Ooops did I run into your Call Girl hour again?'_

_'Greg...'_

_She was worried to death about something, his face shifted from banter to confusion. The person in the chair turned and his heart stopped beating as he saw who made his way to Princeton Plainsboro._

_'You...!'_

* * *

House's face fell, then changed into a grimace of anger and pain. His eyes shifted to Cuddy who's shoulders were slumped, intently staring at her files.

'Greg...'

This time Stacy stood and looked at him longingly, he took a step back, tried to keep up the stony facade. He started to think of all the insults he wanted to yell at her, his hand clutching at his cane.

Before he could erupt he was stopped by a soft tiny hand on his. Cuddy's hand, warm and soothing, a gentle squeeze to calm him.

'House, Stacy will be working here as a lawyer for some time.'

'Can't you go back to hell where you came from? Is little cripple Marks pain not satisfying anymore? Was he starting to be serious work, demanding your help? Huh Stacy? Are you bolting again from someone that would need you?'

Stacy didn't budge, no sign that th comments hit home, only Cuddy had reacted, had pulled her hand from him and the anger he was radiating.

'Thanks Lisa for the Job, I should be able to start tomorrow.'

With that she left, leaving him no satisfaction, she hadn't screamed back, hadn't even graced him with one look of anger. When the door clicked shut after her House's anger was guided towards the only one left in the room. He send an Icy glare to Cuddy, who was slumped in a chair, all energy drained from her.

'How dare you...you...'

He couldn't for the words, he couldn't understand all the emotions running through him, At first his deceitful heart pounded hard at the sight of his ex lover, then his brain got his say and the pain Stacy had left him with floored him.

'Greg sit down, please.'

Cuddy tried to drag him down into the other chair, he swatted her hand away and shoved the chair, making it fall over. She cringed and looked at him fearful.

'Let me explain.'

'You damn well better have a good explanation for that one Cuddy. I can't believe it. What are you trying to do? What Lisa? Because I really don't get it.'

'She was left by Mark, had nowhere to go. When she left the last time I promised her to always have a spot open for her. She...asked for help. How could I have declined?'

She couldn't look at him, which made him boil more, with a fast violent movement he turned her chair towards him, forcing her to look. Her eyes were swimming, the situation even harder on her than he thought, but her pain couldn't diminish his anger. She was shocked by his move and slid deeper into the cushion of the chair, scared tearful eyes pleading with him to calm.

'Have you forgotten what she did to me? Did you forget what Stacy did to us all those years ago? No you can't be that forgiving Cuddy.'

He was towering over her dangerously and crowded her more and more with each word. She pushed at his chest and shakily moved out of the chair, shaking her head. Before she could get away he grabbed her wrist sharply and twisted her back to him, only loosening his grip as he saw a flicker of pain on her face. Pulling her wrist upwards so she couldn't use any leverage against him he stared her down.

'You stupid cow. Did you really forget? Just erased it because it didn't fit into your perfect life, with your perfect studies? Just erased the seemingly perfect guy that cheated on you?'

Cuddy tried getting away from him, trying to ward of the emotion of the memory. Yes she had tried to forget their past. He hurt her more than anyone ever before, she forgave both of them when they came to her hospital the first time. So long ago when he had the infarction. She had helped, because she had still loved him and would've never accepted his death.

It had almost killed her to treat him, see them together. See him with the woman he had used to cheat on her. The woman he had given the whole deal, living together, thinking about getting a dog and all that stuff she always had hoped for in her life.

No the pain was still as fresh as when she had found them in his bed, trying to surprise him with a weekend off, just the two of them, only to find out that he had someone else to keep his bed warm. But she had dealt with it. Labeled it as her first adult infatuation, thinking there was more to come. She was wrong. She chose to be Dean of Medicine hoping it would give her more in life, figuring soon that it took all from her. Her life was dull, one donor meeting chasing the other, meeting after meeting. But it made her forget all the pain she had faced.

A year into the job and she had almost forgotten him. The love she had experienced with him. And then he came back and her world came tumbling down again. But she saved him. Kept him crippled but alive, and that knowledge, of her betrayal of his wishes had left her crippled too. Forever the cause of his constant pain.

House pulled her wrist harder making her wince, trying to get her attention.

'Greg...please you're hurting me.'

It made him drop her hand immediately, her tears had spilled over, her gaze shifted away from him, as she felt his anger and disappointment flood over her. He saw it then, it made him swallow hard and finally sit. Yes he remembered too. The look she had given him when she found him with Stacy, the ultimate betrayal. This was her again, the Lisa that swallowed her pain for his sake.

'Why are you doing this to us again?'

It was a weak question, his anger had drained and he sat slumped in the chair. Cuddy had kept the distance between them, fearing he'd hurt her physically. He looked at her forlorn and willed her to answer him.

'Because she needed help. I was never one to decline that. I offered you a job too. Even if it was you that cheated on me with her. I'm not feasting on my anger like you Greg, I actually can forgive. But God forbid the great Gregory House actually make an effort to accept her back. Or are you afraid you're gonna jump into bed with her again?'

She barely held the venom back as she snarled at him angrily. Now it was her turn to yell.

'You behave like I'm the bad person here. Don't you dare to forget what brought us into this situation. You couldn't keep your pants closed around her and now you put the anger that it didn't work on me? I advise you find someone else to blame Dr House, because this time I won't take your blows anymore. I'm fed up with it.'

He wasn't gaping but he surely felt like doing so. Was she telling him what he thought she did? She was back behind her desk, open folders in front of her, dismissal lining her features.

'I have work to do Dr. House and I am sure you have some clinic hours to complete. You may leave now.'

Nodding he left silently, knowing to let her cool down before trying to talk to her again. If she even would listen to her again.

When he had left, Lisa locked her door and and drew the blinds, then laid down on her couch and tried analyzing the torrent of emotions that cursed through her. Why did he have to bring their past up again? Why couldn't they just forget, live on?

Would it break their necks to have Stacy back? Sure was she scared of the other woman. Somehow Greg had always been drawn to the lawyer, had always dropped everything to help this woman and be with her. Would it be the same this time? Would she find them in bed again one day?

Whatever would happen, her decision was made. She had uttered the idiotic promise and now had to stick to it.


	23. Chapter 23

Princeton Plainsboro was known as many things. One of the best Hospitals on the east coast, the hospital with daily free clinic, one of Americas best teaching Hospitals, and Americas fastest gossip mill.

The news that Stacy Warner was back had reached the top floor around 10, three hours after she actually stepped over the threshold. Around 11 Wilson had gathered all his willpower to search for House and asking what was going on since he could not reach Cuddy.

James had searched practically everywhere, even the chapel, House had vanished once again. As he walked past Cuddy's office he saw that all her blinds were drawn. He expected to hear thunder and be struck by lightning simply walking by the Deans office. None came and he made his way to his office fast. Just before he could enter his pager went off, getting it out of his pant pocket clumsily he looked at the message puzzled.

_'Consult needed, Morgue, compartment 7' _

Yeap, speak of the Devil.

'Don't you think its morbid to hide here?'

'I'm burying my friendship with Cuddy. Thought I'd say my last goodbyes.'

House sat slumped on a stool, head low, leaning on his cane.

'What happened now? What did you do to end it this time?'

'I never said it was over. She's just not my friend anymore. D'uh you really think I would give up the sex?'

The petulant five year old was back, only this time he masked anger and sadness as well as fear with the petulance.

'C'mon House either you spill or I'm gonna go back to my work.'

'I thought this was the place you're most often. Heard your department lucked out on live rates again this year.'

Wilson rolled his eyes and tried to bite back nasty remarks. No use with them. The guy would have to go home to Cuddy and that was going to be punishment enough. So he stuck with a :

'Very funny House.' .

This time he looked up, sensing that Wilson was about to leave.

'You heard right? She...she gave Stacy a job.'

The cane thumped down on the floor harder and faster, House's anger getting worse by the minute.

'So what? What are you afraid of? It's no monster hiding under your bed House. It's just a woman. You have Cuddy, you're almost unbearably happy around her, and I mean happy as in House 'happy'.'

'I yelled at Cuddy for accepting her back. She brought something up, from our past, that scares me. I...don't know if it could happen again. How could she do this? Get Stacy back?'

'Can you actually believe it, maybe she really trusts you, stupid eh House? I don't really get you. Wait, what do you mean with you're scared it could happen again?'

House's shoulders slumped more, he grabbed his cane harder, his knuckles turning white.

'Cheating comes natural to Stacy, and up until the day I met her I would've never done something like it. But, I felt lonely. My girlfriend had just started internship, 48 hour shifts, no time for me, nights spend at her apartment and the phone turned off. She wouldn't even answer the door. And then...I met Stacy. She was there when I was lonely. It kept going, Stacy was a nice change from the loneliness. I never thought about it being wrong until my girlfriend stood in my bedroom door, looking at me with a look...Wilson...never once had someone looked so disappointed at me.'

He took a deep breath. He'd revealed his biggest secret, made himself vulnerable.

'Would you do to Lisa what you did to your girlfriend?'

House snorted and looked up, keeping back the laughter that bubbled up in him at the idiocy of the situation.

'Oh Wilson, dear old Jimmy...I already did that to Cuddy. The intern, my girlfriend, It was Cuddy. Young and fresh from University. I was her tutor at hospital. We, erased our past when I came here because of the job offer, a silent agreement that it never happened.'

James was gaping now, then he snorted. It figures that they had longer history laced with madness and pain. It just fit the two so good.

'And now you think you'll jump back into Stacy's bed? Hurt Cuddy again?'

Another angry and hard cane thump.

'No...I don't want to. Not again. I ...like...what I have now. I know back then, it wouldn't have lasted anyways. We weren't ready. Now, now she can deal with me. Cuddy knows me better than anyone, better than Stacy, because she never ran from me, she always stuck around to be there. But I don't understand why she would get Stacy back. Didn't understand it the first time, nor now.'

Wilson slapped his shoulder and shrugged, not having an answer to that.

'You better ask her House. She's the only one who will have an answer. If you haven't royally fucked up yet by screaming at her for cheating on her.'

He was left alone once more. Pondering what he should do. Today it had finally hit home how many blows Cuddy had already taken from him without saying a word. Just taking whatever he dished out and still she kept him close, offered him a job, saved his ass a thousand times and then accepted him back in her bed. He doubted he was worth it. Maybe ol' Jimmy was right tho and showing her he tried would be enough for her.

It was past 9 when Cuddy finally made it home. She was exhausted, her back paining her, not starting with the way her feet felt in her Heels and her head was pounding. She dropped her purse next to the coat rack, hit her answering machines button, no new messages, kicked her heels of and almost jumped as they landed next to male sports shoes. Lisa was to tired to even get angry, she simply stopped caring. If he was here to yell more she'd just lock herself into her bedroom.

Walking into the kitchen she ignored him on her way, he was on her couch, staring at her wooden floor. She warmed up some Thai, put it on two plates and then put one in front of him on the couch table. She stayed in the kitchen then, eating there, checking her mail. He didn't enter her den until he had finished his food and brought back the plate. House stopped next to the table looking down at her.

'Can...we talk?'

'I believe you had your say House. I don't need to hear another tirade, I'm tired and pissed off so just leave me. Go home. Just...don't stay.'

She was rubbing her wrist, the one he had grabbed, again he took her arm, pulled her sleeve up and examined if he'd hurt her seriously before she could pull away and glare at him.

'I was angry at myself, at Stacy, mostly at you. Because all those years, you haven't said a damn word about what I did to you. You just accepted it and lived on. Now she's back and it feels like you, I don't know, like you don't care about what I did, what Stacy could want now that Mark is gone. You've never yelled at me for it, never hit me with your tiny fists or cried. You just went on and it made me feel like you don't care.'

Cuddy stood and put her plate away, then scrubbed the dishes and glasses while he still stood there watching, waiting.

'I had to let you go back then. It hurt like hell, finding you two, but what would fighting for you have helped? You would've only pulled back more. It still hurts me, when I see her, when I saw you last year, the pain she put on you again, how crazy you were for her. I do care House. But I also know not to push you. You'll do whatever you want to.'

He stepped closer to her, laid his hands on her small shoulders. They slumped, her tight muscles rigid under his hands. House took another tentative step, his front almost pressed against her back now. His hands were massaging her shoulders, hoping to ease the tension in them as well the tension between them. Lisa took the last step back, pressing them together, inhaling shakily, the contact always making shivers run through her.

'I can't live with another disappointment Greg. Not again, please. It would be too much. I could live with us parting because we're both bullheaded, but I can not live with you cheating another time.'

He hushed her before she could go on, pulling her hands out of the sink and drying them with the towel next to it before turning her and hugging her close. He stayed still, held himself back from promising. He would try, he promised himself as much. If she could try to forget then he could try to not disappoint her.

At first he wanted to stay on the Couch, give her space to think. So he put bedding down, and tried to squeeze his uge form on her tiny couch, dry swallowing two pills after his failed attempt, his left leg dangling of the couch. After half an hour she came down, wearing her nighty, hair open. Pulling the blanket of him she took his hand and led him to her room.

They simply slept that night. Her face pressed into the side of his neck, her breathing warm and light on him, hand splayed on his chest over his beating heart.


	24. Chapter 24

'Don't you think it's a bad idea to have Stacy Warner back considering what happened to House last time? He's already more grumpy than he used to be lately.'

_I'd be too if you were working with me all the time and asking such questions. D'uh!_

'Dr. Cameron I am quite sure that Dr. House can deal with her presence just fine and maybe it moves him to obtain less lawsuits.'

Cuddy would've snorted at her own comment but the face Cameron pulling was already enough.

'I just think that...'

'Dr. Cameron I can assure you that I am able to think on my own. Now if you would please go to clinic and help Dr. Foreman and Chase and complete your clinic hours I'd be more than thankful.'

Cameron stomped of, almost huffing at being reprimanded and Cuddy did not feel an ounce of guilt for smiling to herself. The younger woman definitely had a way of being politely unfriendly.

'You know that it's sexy when bitch at her?'

This time she snorted and rolled her eyes. House had been hiding in her bathroom since Cameron almost walked in on them making out. Just one more coincidence Cuddy didn't need.

'No more coming here and kissing me House!'

It sounded weak in her own ears, maybe due to the fact that his rough lips were already back on her neck, kissing up and down then latching onto her collarbone. She pushed against his chest softly until he let go with a disgruntled look on his face.

'Since when are you a prude?'

'Since your lacky almost walked in on us again. There is one thing I don't need before noon and that is pissed, heartbroken Allison Cameron. By the way shouldn't you be at clinic too?'

Cuddy was was already behind her desk again, putting a fair distance between them.

'I thought sleeping with you would bring me some side benefits.'

House pouted and the waggled his brows.

'Besides the sleeping with me part and getting dinner cooked by me, using my shower, sleeping in my bed which you have just noted this morning, might not be as big as yours or have nice manly bedspreads, but is undeniable soft and awesome to your back?'

She wasn't even looking up throughout her statement, only when she finished her sentence did she raise her eyes to meet his with a no nonsense look.

'You wound me sometimes, degrading us to sex, food and beds.'

'Dito, now go finish your weeks clinics hours, only four more to go and maybe if you're a good boy you'll get a treat tonight.'

'Making promises again and not keeping them?'

'If I remember correctly you got your treat for being on time yesterday.'

House grinned and if it wouldn't have been him he would've probably blushed at the memory attacking him. He nodded silently and send her a wink.

'Be prepared this time it's gonna be more than a full body massage.'

'And you behave today. I don't want more of your Doctors coming here and whining.'

He winked at her and smirked leaving her with a hot and heavy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

'So I heard you went crying to mommy because daddy was mean?'

House gave Cameron a nasty smirk, watching her stomp into another exam room, as she was just about to slam the door in his face he caught it with his cane, grabbed her wrist and made her turn to him, glaring at her truly angered.

'Listen to me Allison, either you stop snooping around in my personal business or I'll be the one to set you straight next time. No more Cuddy and I can imagine she was the good cop. Is that clear?'

Cameron nodded and yanked her arm free, disappearing into the exam room.

As he spun around again he came face to face with Stacy Warner, his face merging from nasty to angered.

'I need you to hand in the evaluation of your team Greg.'

She tried to calm him with a small smile but was almost ran over as he stormed past her. Everyone was watching by now or whispering behind hands. Stacy followed him, persistent as she was.

'I know, when I left, we weren't on the best terms with each other...'

before she could say more he turned around swiftly and stared her down. His face was an angry mask and he was just about to start yelling profanities at her as the well known click-clack made it's way towards him. Cuddys hand was on his arm and softly pulled him away.

'House, just save us some trouble and hand in the damn evaluations. You two don't wanna see each other then at least try to avoid the other.'

Lisa rolled her eyes at Greg's infuriated stare towards Stacy, as if wanting to remind her that this was the evil. She didn't care though, giving Stacy a courteous nod and then walking towards her office.

'You follow me House we need to talk about the files you were supposed to hand in.'

She had yelled at him again, trying to reason with him to try to avoid Stacy and for once just do his work. She even threatened him with a cut back on the sleepovers, begged him to just stay away from Stacy. After Lisa had finished her rant he had simply leaned down and kissed her deeply. When in need for air she broke the sensual embrace reluctantly and then scowled at him.

'We had agreed on keeping this away from work.'

'Actually you agreed not me. I actually believe this is the best way to relive both our stress.'

Stealing another kiss he grinned against her mouth before she could shove him back.

'Stop it House.'

Cuddy sighed and then went around her desk putting order in the files her assistant put on it.

'And don't forget to bring the stuff from the grocery list or you won't have anything to eat tonight.'

She actually had to smile, if only a little. Greg stood with a pout, leaning heavily on his cane.

'Hmph fine. But I'm clearing out earlier to go grocery shop and you can't stop me.'


	25. Chapter 25

It had been relaxing, having House over. Even cooking for him had been an easy job since he'd only asked her if she could make Carbonara sauce and pasta. Easy job, Cuddy was an expert in Carbonara sauce. But something was off with him, she just had to figure out what.

'Oncology Nurse staff was a little jumpy today.'

She gave him a look that clearly stated that she thought it was his doing.

'Don't look at me like that I swear it wasn't me. But I have heard that, after his talk with Stacy about missing evaluation papers, Wilson got kind of angered.'

He had that superior smirk plastered on his face again. She was puzzled, knowing that Wilson had never missed out on sending papers in at time. She sighed and gave House her patented: you're-so-childish-and-not-cute look.

'Do I have to guess what happened to the papers or are you going to tell me?'

'I really have no idea what you are talking about Lisa. So ...food?'

He grinned and trapped her against the counter she was currently working on, pressing his front seductively against her back, rubbing an pressing in all the right places. He had taken of his suit Jacket after he threw his shoes into her hallway closet, intent on adding another pair of his trainers.

Kissing up and down her neck Greg watched her cook the pasta and get the sauce mix ready to put over the steaming Pasta. The trick was the fresh eggs in the sauce that would start boiling when in contact with the hot spaghettie. The only thing fried in the sauce was the Parma ham she had bought at the deli shop just for him.

Lisa drew in a shaky breath and tried hard to concentrate on mixing and stirring the ingredients and not the way his warm and soft lips felt on her pulse point. A moan escaped her lips and she felt Greg grin against her neck in victory.

'I'd stop if I was you, the pasta will over boil.'

Lisa made him step back and shot him an admonishing look before draining the spaghettie and then pouring the sauce over them, stirring the pasta for good 5 minutes so that the egg sauce could boil. When satisfied with the result she turned back to him smiling. He had leaned against the other counter, watching her with what would be best described as his bedroom stare and left no room to wonder what he was thinking about.

'I haven't been standing here for the past hour, preparing what you wished for, only to have you dragging me off to the bedroom. It'll get cold Greg. We eat first.'

The decision had been made and not even his famous kicked and sad puppy dog look could get her to forget the food. With a growl Greg followed her to the dining room to eat.

They had collapsed on the couch, full to the brim with delicious, as House had put it, pasta and good white wine and before Lisa could grab what was happening she found herself pressed deep into the cushions, House on her kissing every patch of skin that he could reach. The combination of full tummy and two glasses of white wine made Cuddy giggle whenever House's stubble tickled her neck, ending them both snorting, a sexy and playful grin on Greg's face and a seductive come hither look on hers.

'So Boss, how about that soaking in the tub you promised me?'

She stroked his cheek and nodded.

'Fine, I'll prepare a bath if you do the dishes.'

Lisa was in the bathroom, sitting on the edge of tub, wearing her bathrobe, her hand hanging in the warm water, vanilla smell wafting through the room. She loved the idea of bathing with him, snuggled close together, skin on skin. House was in the kitchen, scrubbing the few dishes while whistling to himself in anticipation, he wore a lazy smile, his tense muscles already relaxing only at the thought of warm water and hot skin pressed against his. The ringing of the bell made him jolt, almost dropping one of her precious plates, before she could get moving to the door she heard him making his way to her door, his gait heavy from a long day.

'Don't worry, I'm on my way.'

With a swift move he had the door open, expecting a neighbor or a wrong address.

House was wrong though. His eyes landed on black Jimmy Choo's, traveling up smooth long legs, to a black skirt. He new the legs as well as the rest of the body. He prayed that his mouth would stay closed, that he could be able to portray smugness and victory. Greg's eyes fell on hers, dilated pupils, red flushed cheeks and a half open mouth. The picture perfect of shock, then hurt mixed with slight anger.

'Greg who is it?'

He thought about telling her to stay were she was, then thought better of it. It was clear what he was doing in Cuddy's house, it was all the more clear as Lisa came into vision in her short gray robe.

'Greg who...'

Her eyes got nearly as wide as Stacy's.

'Hello Lisa.'

The tone was icy, syllables short clipped and House wondered briefly if Stacy's tongue had yet turned into a two tailer. Lisa pulled her robe together, half hiding behind Greg.

'Stacy...'

'Since we're past the formal greetings, my I ask what you're doing here Stacy? Some short notice girls night out? '

House's tone was just as nasty as ever and Lisa wondered if he would be dealing swear words next.

'Actually I was here to thank Dr Cuddy for giving me back my job, now I am wondering why she would do it though.'

Not a single glance at Cuddy, telling her that she was more than unwelcome.

'I am still here you know? I think you should leave _Mrs Warner_.'

Greg was surprised that her voice sounded almost pleasant. No undertone of anger, sadness, fear, no nothing that would tell him if she got the creeps whenever she was close to the woman he betrayed her with, the woman he chose over her because he wasn't able to wait. He hugged her to his side, to calm her, reassure he would stay at her side this time. She disentangled herself though and walked back into the bedroom, head held high.

'When will you cheat on her next because she has no time?'

'Before I say or do something hurtful you might just wanna leave.'

'This isn't over yet Greg.'

It was an empty thread, at least House hoped so.


	26. Chapter 26

After he closed the door in Stacy's face House had felt somewhat relieved, so relieved that a tired sigh actually made it past his lips. Angered beyond believe, he questioned her sanity until he remembered what he had been like when Stacy had returned the first time, married and trying to safe her guy and her marriage. House knew he hadn't been better then.

He had tried his hardest to make her break it with Mark and get her back. Being the winner hadn't been a good time though because it made him painfully aware that Stacy had only wanted him back because she wanted to get rid of crippled Mark, just like she had gotten rid of him when he had been crippled.

'Are you coming? The water will turn cold Greg.'

A smile, more the simple raise of one corner of his mouth, eyes sparkling again at the promise of a bath with his lover and his thoughts went flying. The world and Stacy could wait until tomorrow. Tonight was about them, her, Lisa, trying to show her he would stay this time, he'd wait.

Hand swirling in the water, she sat on the edge of the tub, cheekbones high, proud nose, dark curly hair in a knot, and her robe slipped off one of her shoulders making Lisa Cuddy seem like an ancient Greek Goddess. She would have been Helena, wars breaking out for her. Strong and proud man, warriors, dying in her name, screaming it when blades were thrust into their chests.

Yet here she was, waiting for him, Greg House, misanthrope cripple, the Minotaur. Waiting that he would join her, snuggle her against his chest, hold her and kiss her. She could have anyone she wanted but she wanted him.

'Why?'

House needed to know what made him seem attracting to her, what was it he had that guys like Wilson or Chase didn't possess?

'Why the water is turning cold?'

A confused stare told him he should clear things up, for she couldn't comprehend the jumps his mind took.

'Why me? Why not this dude from the café, Wilson or any other guy?'

Cuddy held her soft hand out, grabbed his and pulled him towards her, making him stand between her legs. The position almost made him lose his mind, with a half groan he pulled himself together though.

'Don't you think that the time isn't the best?'

She didn't look up while swiftly unbuttoning his shirt with her fast fingers. Oh, she had the most talented fingers and hands he had ever had the pleasure of feeling on his body. Still he tried hard to concentrate on the task at hand.

'Please, I need to know.'

Another breathless moan as Lisa pulled his belt open as if she never had done anything else in her life, one push, one pull, his pants dropped. House briefly wondered where she had learned to unbuckle a guy so fast, then decided not to travel those waters of thought. His hand tangled in her hair and he pulled softly to make her look up.

'Lisa...please, when you do that my concentration isn't the best.'

It drew a smirk from her lips. Cuddy licked them and then nodded, her hands leaving his thighs. He undressed then and let her help him get into the tub first, steadying her as she slipped into the water between his spread legs.

Cuddy leaned back against his chiseled chest and sighed with bliss. Warm water surrounding their heated bodies, slick skin pressing and sliding in all the right places. His arms and hands laid on the rim of the tub, the cool surface sending chills through him but the goosebumps only started forming when her warm hands stroked from his elbow down to the back of his own hands, tangling her fingers with his.

'Why would you ask me?'

she was close to whispering, not wanting to break the mood they were in, candles glimmering around them, aroma's from distant worlds wafting around the room like dancing to an unheard melody.

House shrugged, water sloshing around him.

'I ... just wondered.'

He didn't sound unsure. He sounded very sure of himself, too sure, smug. Lisa turned halfway in her sitting position, turning her head to him.

'If you start to believe in what she says then this will end soon Greg. I will not live next to her in your life.'

'Its not about something she said to me. I couldn't give more of a rats ass, be sure of that. Look, we might not function without glitches, but that actually makes part of the package, we're both damaged, bitchy most of the time, but we work well together. Our lows, Lisa, define our highs. Its a feeling I have, that somehow you get someone beautiful, with a beautiful job and a charming house and I wonder that you want to spend your time with me, the one that dealt you the ultimate betrayal.'

Everything went silent around the couple, she sank lower in his arms, taking everything in. he waited, for any reply.

'It hurt, it still stings. I guess I'll always have my insecurity Greg. But we were so young back then, the world was still open to us, standing still meant being old. Now we are here, we celebrated, had a lot of friends, stress. Now we live just to find our goal, not life itself. It will never be easy between us, I know that but for me this means it'll never get boring. Just, give me a chance to be with you, or tell me if you still have any interest in Stacy, so I can leave the field. As I said, I can't and I won't watch again.'

Resignation strung in Cuddy's voice and once more he was aware of the wound he left.

Greg's arms wound around her body, his face pressed against her shoulder. He knew he couldn't ask that she forgave him, he would never deserve that, but he hoped she would believe in him.

'Lets...just not talk about this tonight Greg. I just want to be with you, here, now.'

Lisa turned then and and kissed him deeply and he was content just to reply, let her and her taste wash over him like the water. His hands walked over her flat abdomen, dipping between breasts before laying on them, drawing a moan from her.

House was sitting on the edge of the bed, towel around his shoulders, hair dripping, his face a hard mask. His was desperately massaging his bad thigh, then smirked remembering what brought the tightness and accompanying pain.

When he looked up he saw Lisa sashaying towards him, gloriously nude, towel drying her hair. As she came close House pulled her down next to him, rolling onto her and pressing his lips against hers.

'mmhh...Greg...'

Chuckling she pressed against his chest.

'Let me guess, I won't get sleep tonight?'

He bellowed out a laugh, he was content, he was feeling carefree, he was in her bed, in her arms, he had what he thought he needed.

'I'm intent on making you skip tomorrow.'

Just as Cuddy was about to protest his weight pressed her into the mattress and his hard and hot length between her thighs made her forget her arguments.


	27. Chapter 27

**.:Flashback:. **

'I can't believe you told everybody that I've slept with you! I mean, seriously, what is your problem? First you run into me, spilling your damn coffee on me, yell at me and then tell everyone we're having an affair?'

She was ranting senseless, stupid stuff and Lisa Cuddy only did that when aggravated. The source of her anger however was nowhere close to providing her with an answer.

Gregory House, she found out his name from her roommate, was smirking back at her, sitting on a wooden table outside the lecture hall, casually leaned back on his forearms. She huffed and threw him some brown grocery bag, glaring at him angrily.

'Whatever House, it's not like this is gonna be gossip forever. I've washed your stupid sweater. Bye!'

She turned on her heels and stomped/ sashayed away and House was seriously amazed that a woman her age could sashay, it made her all the more interesting to him and he wondered if he could get her to turn back around. He chuckled to himself, finding that he was intrigued in someone her age group. Jumping off the table gracefully he grabbed his rucksack and jogged after her, slinging his arm over her shoulder heavily once he ran up with her.

'You know darling, I can make anyone on campus believe that you fell for me. Actually you can admit it to me, I'm used to it, really.'

He wriggled his eyebrows before all the air swooshed out of his lungs by being hit by Lisa's fist. She pushed him back and made him lose his footing so he landed on his bum.

'Leave me alone or I'll make everyone believes you pressured me into something, mister hot shot grad student.'

House gaped. No girl had ever had the guts to be that way with him. None, ever. Which made him feel much more inclined to drive her, Lisa Cuddy, insane. He watched her leave this time though, fearing that if he drove her too far he'd be ending up as the suture specimen for tonights suture lessons.

Three days later Cuddy had found a wrapped package on her desk. When she opened it she found a black, lacy bra in it. Staring down at the package horrified, Lisa closed the lid again and whirled around to her roommate.

'Janice? Who gave you that?'

' 't was already here when I came in, thought you left it in a hurry this morning.'

With shaking hands Cuddy opened the lid once more, looking for a card or some sign of the freak who left this. Her finger caught the edge of some paper, she grabbed it and resealed the box as fast as possible.

It was a Starbucks coffee shop card and suddenly it dawned on her who send her the lacy underwear. Face flushing with anger and embarrassment she let out a growl.

'I can't believe this guy!'

On the back of the card his handwriting suggested she'd buy him coffee there while they met and if she preferred, which he definitely did, she could wear the black underwear for the meeting. With no intention of going she put the package under her bed, if he wanted it back he had to get it, she definitely wouldn't accept any of his presents.

Two weeks later Lisa had almost forgotten the incident. Her fellow students had stopped talking about the rumors and the girls had stopped asking her if it was true that she went out with famous Gregory House and if he really was that good.

It was almost like the whole thing hadn't happened and she was relieved, hoping he'd found another victim to harass. Lisa had enough stress without him, still somehow she wondered if he had really been waiting at the café for her. Pushing those thoughts away with a shrug of her shoulders she put the key to her dorm room in the lock and twisted. It had already been open.

'Wondered when you'd get here, usually you don't take that long from dining hall to your dorm.'

Lisa shrieked loudly and dropped her bag but before she could run, his hand pressed the door close.

'WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!'

**.:Flachback end:. **

'You broke into her dorm room and made it out alive?'

Wilson wore a fake puzzled expression on his face which House matched with his own.

'What else should she have done than succumb to my charms?'

A snort ripped from the oncologists throat, making people in the cafeteria turn, staring at him for a second before going back to their food. House looked mildly hurt and annoyed and stole another frie of Wilson's plate.

'You wanna tell me that was the start of your friendship? Breaking into her room?'

'Well it needed a little more persuasion, not much though!'

' Actually he went out of my room with a red hand print on his cheek and needed another semester to really befriend and not just annoy me.'

'Why do you always have to rain on my parade Cuddy?'

House half turned to her, squinting upwards with a raised brow.'

'I always pulled you back to the ground of truth.'

She smiled and sat with them, handing him a sandwich, slapping his hand as it snuck out to get another of Wilson's fries. House sighed dramatically and unpacked his Reuben, smiling when he saw she remembered that he hated pickles.

'So let me get this straight: You hated his guts, but ended up being friends, just like that?'

House smirked, puffing his chest out in a I'm-the-man-way while Cuddy just rolled her eyes.

'House practically drove me insane. Followed me around, waited in front of my lecture halls, tried to sit next to me at meals and in the library. Someday I guess I just caved.'

She gave a nonchalant shrug and then turned her head, remembering the times they had shared, the way he drove her to her limits just to make her relax the next moment.

'Yea until I had to leave we've been the duo infernale.'

House looked over at her and the ghost of a smile passed his lips, making Wilson wonder just what they had gone through at their University days.

'Back then...where you two already...you know?'

Cuddy chuckled and House just took a big chunk out of his Reuben.

'No more story telling today little Jimmy, Mommy and Daddy are eating.'

They sat in silence for awhile, House reminiscing, Cuddy reading through a file she brought and Wilson wondering. Cuddy was the first to leave after she ate her salad and drank her water, reminding House of his clinic duty and Wilson to hand in the evaluation sheets, drawing an almost growl from James.

'So whats with the Stacy thing?'

'Nothing.'

'You want to tell me you just forgot?'

Sighing bored, House crumbled up his napkin and violently threw it onto his plate.

'She knows about Cuddy and me, wasn't pleased and told me this wasn't over yet.'

'And you call that nothing?'

Wilson was exasperated, the guy had nerves he had to give House that. Stacy Warner was known as a Pitbull in court, who got what she wanted, in real live she must be even more scary. Still Greg kept looking bored out of his mind, turning his head to a child who stuck his tongue out at him and returning the favor.

'I don't care, thats what makes the difference Jimmy. I simply don't care.'

'You might be secure in this, pain free, it's not you I'm worrying about tho. I think about the damage Stacy could inflict in Cuddy.'

House's fist clenched almost painfully, his head snapping up gazing intently at the younger man across him, fear etched on his features. His mind was reeling, Wilson was right, it was all about tactics. If Stacy knew he didn't care then she would search for the weak link. And that was still Lisa.

* * *

Whoa uploaded all the recent chapters today. I'll try to update as soon as possible. Hope you enjoyed till now.

R&R very, very, very welcome.


	28. Chapter 28

Lisa had been talking to him for at least 10 minutes. Telling about her day, what had happened at the benefactors meeting, growling, laughing and muttering. Greg wasn't listening though. He sat at the kitchen counter, watching her stacking food he would never eat in his fridge, hoping that was a promise for her staying the weekend. Twirling his cane he thought about Wilson's words. Was Cuddy still so vulnerable that she would believe anything Stacy would say?

'And then I jumped Atkins and did him on the conference table...'

He kept staring ahead mumbling a 'yeah', Lisa raised a brow and stopped unpacking the Deli bags.

'Greg...House!'

Pinching his arm, she finally got his attention.

'Ouch! What did you do that for?'

'Did you listen?'

'I have things on my mind, ok?'

'Those would be?'

Raising the other brow to accompany the first one and damn she really wanted a qualified answer.

'Just a patient.'

Lisa dropped her hand and nodded. She knew not to say a thing. He hated interfering or comfort words whenever he wasn't able to find out what was wrong.

'I can leave if you'd like to be alone.'

'No! Don't...I'd like you to stay.'

She nodded and then kept stacking, then cooked, while he sat silently, pondering. An hour passed which felt to him like minutes, watching her every move. Analyzing what she did in his home, how she fit into his kitchen perfectly, how somehow she made his apartment look lively just by walking through it.

'Do you trust me?'

'Where does all this question asking come from suddenly? Usually you're content with things the way they are.'

Cuddy put a plate of Chicken breast and vegetable rice in front of him and then took her place across the counter. House frowned down at his plate.

'That, I'm not happy with. Did you lace my rice with veggies?'

House muttered and made a 'yuck' face before pushing the rice around on the plate.

'Eat it or don't House.'

She wasn't even a bit put off by his comment. He usually took seconds even if anything was laced with veggies.

'Stacy came to me to apologize today... .'

House's fork hit the plate.

'Really..?'

'Ok...what is it? You never act this...this way. And now that...?'

'Just don't trust Stacey.'

House stood up and left for the living room, seconds later she heard the faint piano music wafting over to the kitchen. She sighed and decided to give him some space while she busied herself cleaning the dishes and pans. She was worried by his behavior, the whole Stacy thing had him walking on a tightrope emotionally. He avoided talking anymore about the past between them, flat out refused any cooperation with Stacy in legal aspects so that she had to delegate between them. It had left her almost as tired and cranky as he was tonight.

After she finished with putting everything away she followed him to the living room. House made space for her on the piano bench and kept playing. For awhile she sat and listened content with the silence, but soon questions kept rising in her head. His behavior was odd, even for his standards.

In the middle of the piece she stilled his hands with putting hers on top.

'What made you say that I shouldn't trust her?'

House pulled his hands away and rubbed them over his face.

'When she came to your place, she threatened me that this wasn't over yet. She won't attack me since she knows she won't get to me like that again...'

'And so you figured she'd go for me and weakling that I am, I would succumb to her and leave you so she can win you back?'

Cuddy said that in her sickening sweet voice, adding a lash flutter for show.

'Do you trust me at all Greg? Have I ever let you down?'

His hand landed on her knee, rubbing softly to make some of the anger vanish.

'I sometimes don't trust myself so it's hard to ask that from someone else and see it in someone else.'

She sighed warily and pecked his cheek.

'I'm off to bed. At least join me at a reasonable time ok?'

* * *

Woohoo finally got it done. After sitting on it for months. Writers block has lifted and thats just an interrim chapter, so it's a little shorter. Enjoy and comments are looooooooooove. 


	29. Chapter 29

Every time they had argued in the last couple of weeks,Cuddy had gone to bed early, giving him a peck and telling him to come to bed and every time he would play bluesy tones for her. As if saying sorry by playing her something so she might fall asleep better.

This time Lisa had stayed awake though and waited. After about an hour she heard him move, the soft tunes of the baby grand subsiding, his bare feet shuffling on the hardwood floor. She loved to see him barefoot, not really knowing why but she thought it was sexy as hell.

He went to the bathroom, brushing his teeth, getting his pajama bottoms on. Only those since she told him that she loved it when he came to bed without a shirt. When he finally crept into the room he tried setting his cane down as quietly as possible, she switched the bedside lamp on and pulled the comforter down for him.

'You're not asleep.'

'I wanted to apologize for what I said. I know it's just your way of worrying.'

Greg nodded and then limped over to the bed, hanging his cane onto his nightstand. He got into bed and turned to her.

'I...do trust you, more than myself.'

Lisa nodded and switched off the light again before kissing him tenderly and then snuggling against his side.

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

'So I thought since we stayed at my place last weekend, ate my food, this week it's your turn.'

'You broke into my office, again.'

House was currently leaning against her desk, playing with a flummy and smirking at her cheekily. Lisa made her way over, grabbed the flummy from him and put him back into the desk drawyer where he had stolen it from. With a reprimanding look she shoved at his shoulder and made him move away from the desk over to a chair.

'You can't stay over this week.'

She neatly stacked the files once more after he had brought them out of order, avoiding his eyes.

'You are hosting a orgy and don't want me with you because you would be unable to let go of me? I would have never thought you're that egoistic.'

She had to smile at his words.

'A little less fun than that. There's a conference in New York. I'll be attending it.'

'A Conference? Spawns of Satan Deans United?'

House walked over to her again, hovering above her and leering at her cleavage.

'I'll be gone from Tuesday till Friday. So no stay over.'

'You don't have to go. You could take the time off with me, we'd just lay around, maybe on each other, while they have their important whatever Conference.'

It was almost cute, for a second he had the look of a deer caught in car light, maybe fearing to be alone. She stood and rounded her desk, packing everything she needed to take with her.

'Since when do you know about this?'

'Greg, they told me yesterday. I've been cramped in this office all day preparing the files I need to take with me. I'm sorry it's so short notice and that it interferes with any of your sleepover plans but I have to go.'

'Fine, but I'll be mopey the rest of the day.'

With a 'harumph' he let himself fall on her couch, his arm draped over his eyes dramatically and moans of pain and despair rising from his chest, making him more than worthy of an Oscar. Lisa shook her head at his antics and kept working stoically, his moans of distress becoming louder and longer.

As it knocked she tried to shut House up, who only took it as his chance to lay it on even thicker by throwing in sniffels.

'God damn it House!'

'What's wrong with him? Did his Playboy Abo run out again?'

Wilson smirked as he walked towards Cuddy's desk, nodding over his shoulder to address House.

'He's mopey.'

'Told him about the conference?'

'HE KNEW?!'

House looked at them petulantly.

'Here we go, thanks Wilson and yes Greg, he knew, because the board scheduled me for the conference.'

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

'Wilson will be second in command, so be nice. Do your clinic hours or I'll tripple them. Do not hunt Wilson with requests for idiotic tests and leave the legal department alone. Remember the less law suits...'

'...the less I have to deal with Stacy, evil mistress of the morality textbooks, blaaaa blaaaaa blaaaaaaaaaaa.'

House rolled his eyes for emphasis and then flopped down on her bed next to the suitcase Lisa was packing.

'Are you mopey again?'

'No, since it didn't actually help.'

Leaning down she kissed him softly and then smiled at him.

'Only till Friday after that I will be requesting your time in the evenings again and you won't have any guys night for some days. Use your time wisely. So...how about some Italian take out?'

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The conversation was light to non existent between them while they ate. House was still not over his mopey phase like he had predicted and felt put down because he'd be left behind with Wilson.

'It's not so bad House, god you're behaving like a five year old. It's only two nights.'

'But Wilson is not as good in bed as you are!'

'I will just pretend you never said and implied anything about Wilson and having sex with him.'

He went back to moping, shooting her looks whenever he was sure that she was actually looking and Lisa would reply with a well practiced eye roll.

She cleared the table and left him sitting there, his arms folded on the table and his head laying on them, picture perfect of petulant.

She went to be early, taking a book with her to read because she did not feel like spending her time with House when he was barely talking to her. Half an hour later he followed her to bed. He undressed to his boxers and then crawled in next to her, putting his head on her midriff. Lisa stroked through his thinning hair affectionately and put her book away, feeling that his mood was gone.

'You ok now?

House didn't answer, he pulled the blanket off her and started kissing and nibbling on her soft skin, intent on making sure she would miss him the next two nights and for emphasis leaving her with some well placed hickeys.

* * *

Hope you liked. R&R is always welcome. Points animatedly to Submit Review field


	30. Chapter 30

Authors note: Lots of this chapter's ideas are from my Friend Prinnie, who constantly makes me crack up with her quirkiness and Huddyrific ideas. So, to please her and say thanks that way I followed her Huddy ramblings. By the way Takashimaya is existing, even on 5th Ave, I just don't know if the have bathrobes/ dressing robes. Harry Winston is existing too, same with Takashimaya.

* * *

Autumn was almost over and Winter was on its way, bringing colder winds and the first frost as well as the pre-Christmas buzz and New York was in full swing with it.

Cuddy actually liked that time of the year. Although her mother being Jewish the Cuddy family had followed their fathers religious believes, he was Protestant, too. So the Cuddy's celebrated first Hanukkah and then Christmas itself, never once questioning either believe. She loved Christmas and Hanukkah and mixed their rituals to Chrismukkah, as many mixed religious families had done before them.

It was the start of November and only two months to go to get all the Christmas shopping done, knowing that delaying it any further would mean she would only get half of the things on her list. Cuddy made her way past reception and then out the front entrance of the Waldorf, lunch had just been served and all meetings adjourned until after three, giving her at least 3 hours of shopping time.

She made her way slowly up and down 5th Avenue, looking here and there, and actually buying a few things. Slowly her shopping list got smaller, and the weight of stress on her shoulders dissipated with it. Now she only had to think of something for Greg and Wilson, her Mother and Father. For Wilson she thought about a tie, her parents loved traveling, so her parents would get a travel from her. Greg was the only real problem. What to get someone who's only real wish was to get his life back? 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

He had almost lost her twice in the throngs of New Yorkers, criss crossing his way over and over, making it hard to follow but also making it hard for her to acknowledge that she was being followed. He waited patiently whenever she made her way into shops, once getting a hot chocolate to warm himself, the other time getting a hot dog or sitting on a bench reading a newspaper to look like your regular New Yorker. He thought he'd managed quite well. Until he lost her again.

Turning in a circle he quickly assessed the few shops where she could've gone into. He decided for Takashimaya since the Disney store seemed off, even for her. The Raven haired beauty was probably on a hunt for pricey Jasmine blended green tea or wellness massage oil. Maybe she was starting to realize that she was missing some cups in her mental cupboard and decided to get some new one's, Japan style.

The culprit smirked at the thought and creeped into the shop. She definitely had one loose for letting him work for her, she should've known what to expect. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

Takashimaya's Wellness department held everything a woman could possibly wish for and it was everything but cheap.

Cuddy's hands stroked over the fabric of an Japan style dress robe, the soft silk slipping through her fingers, the stitchings the only rougher feature of the cloth. She ended up buying one for herself and one for House as part of her Christmas present for him.

Before leaving the store she went into it's tea shop and bought some Jasmine tea for home as well as taking one with her to go. For a moment she had a funny feeling at the back of her neck, the smell of a perfume let her stop in mid stride out the door. That mix of perfume soap and sweat... . She chuckled to herself. She just always felt followed, thanks to House. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

She had almost caught him before he could Vanish in the crowd on the other side of the street. He walked up 5th Ave and slipped into the first store presenting itself far away enough. After all he wasn't here to follow her all day long. He had a job to take care of.

'May I help you Sir?'

He swiveled around and stared at the shop lady, registering his surroundings for the first time. He had landed himself in a Jewelery store. A schooled look to the door revealed the name Harry Winston and had him smirking. Leave it to her to make him flee into one of the most expensive Jewelers store's around. Well nothing about Lisa Cuddy was cheap.

'Actually, you could. I am searching for a Christmas present. To accompany earrings much like those.'

He pointed to Pear shaped diamond earrings.

'Well let me show you some things.'

An hour later he left the store, his bank account a little lighter and his smile more firmly set. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

After the last meeting Lisa went back to her room, intent on taking a soak and enjoying room service, which was free for he, thanks to the board. Once in the room she wriggled out of her shoes and made her way to her bed.

She gasped as her eyes landed on a present box, simple black wrapping and black bow. Her heartbeat and pulse sped up as she made her way forward, lifting the lid of the box to reveal a simple black dress, the neck line low enough to reveal cleavage, but not low enough to expose. She lifted the dress by it's straps from the box, estimating it would just end under her knees and holding it against her she found herself having been right.

She looked back into the box to find a card with a neat and all too well known handwriting declaring to get dressed for the evening and be ready by 7.

Cuddy didn't know if she should be infuriated or extremely pleased by the lengths he had gone to please her.

By 7 she had decided she was pleased. The dress fit her perfectly, hugging and accentuating her curves. She had put on a light make up and put her hair up, leaving it curly as she knew he loved it. A rap on the door made her jump with excitement on the inside. With measured steps she went towards the door and opened it slowly.

* * *

TBC...MWAH.


	31. Chapter 31

Authors Note: The Sushi restaurant Shimizu's is real existent.

* * *

_By 7 she had decided she was pleased. The dress fit her perfectly, hugging and accentuating her curves. She had put on a light make up and put her hair up, leaving it curly as she knew he loved it. A rap on the door made her jump with excitement on the inside. With measured steps she went towards the door and opened it slowly._

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

Cuddy gasped at the figure in the hallway, then started to smile before she blushed as it hit her how much he had done just for her today. House was standing before her, his hair groomed and neatly combed, his stubble gone, a masculine smell of shaving cream and aftershave surrounding him. He was wearing an expensive looking 3 piece suit, the button down shirt even ironed but most importantly he had exchanged his flame cane for something more classy.

'Hi.'

From behind his back he produced a single long stemmed red rose. Lisa reached for it, her fingers passing over his hand softly, then grabbed the rose while her other hand went out to grab his free hand to pull him in. Stepping onto her tiptoes she met his forward movement and kissed him tenderly. Cuddy had to admit to herself that she had been missing him during the day, but even more when she laid alone in the big bed the night before. They had been getting used to staying with each other.

'I would be mad, if I wouldn't be so happy that you're here.'

She mumbled against his mouth, the soft feeling of his face on hers unusual.

'Wilson threw me out for the duration of your conference.'

'How did you make that happen?'

Cuddy looked at him puzzled and slipped her coat on.

'I threatened a little, only a little, and he gave up. He's so easy.'

House snorted and leaned down to kiss her again.

'Would you do me the pleasure Miss Cuddy and go out eat with me?'

'I should really be angry at you.'

She sighed and then took the offered hand, smiling at him brightly. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

They had landed at Shimizu's Sushi Restaurant Just a few blocks to the West. House had reserved a table in the cozy Bar and Restaurant.

'This restaurant was in my Lifestyle guide from last month.'

'I know, the magazine is at my place.'

'Since when are you planning this?'

They sat at their table and ordered some water, then started looking through the menu.

'Since Wilson told me about the trip the board would schedule for you. So...about three weeks.'

Cuddy gaped at him then chuckled.

'I can't believe you actually made me feel bad about leaving.'

Both ended up ordering a selection of California rolls and sake Wine. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

'I can't believe you poured that over me. Thats one of the most expensive Champagne's of the hotel.'

'So what? The Board is paying for the sexcapades right?'

House licked around her navel once more and grinned, his hands pressing her hips down, stopping her from writhing.

'Oh god that tickled!'

Cuddy pulled him upwards, laughing against his neck, his fingertips still skimming her sides.

'Greg, Stop it!'

She was laughing harder, her chest heaving rapidly from all the strain. His hands stopped and he pulled her harder against himself, groaning from the friction their bodies created together. The hunger suddenly build again, the lust shining in both their eyes.

House pulled the sheet off of her midriff before putting his hand on her center, smirking when he found her hot and wet. Lisa's hips buckled upwards into his hand, searching for the pressure and it's relieve.

'Greg...please...'

Her hands roamed over the plains of his naked body, clutching at his back and ass, pulling him down onto her, making her feel him. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

' God it's already 3 in the morning. I have to get some sleep, there's another meeting tomorrow morning.'

Cuddy groaned and snuggled deeper into his embrace, the cold air sweeping the room going unnoticed by the two lovers, warmed by their bodies pressed together under the blankets.

'Just skip it.'

'I can't, the board pays for all this and I will go to the meeting.'

She slapped his hand away as he tried sneaking it between her thighs.

'You will have to let me sleep House.'

'Oh fine, but you'll order breakfast on this room for me when you leave.'

House kissed her neck tenderly while pulling her close again, tangling their legs on purpose. His hand came to rest on her breast possessively and she had to chuckle before falling into a deep slumber. 

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

When House woke he immediately rubbed his hand down his thigh. He started getting used to the after morning pain in his leg. He actually came to like it in some way. It meant that he was alive. He was still there, still desirable. He could still get the Hospital hottie, and he had actually kept her, hadn't been able to push her away.

As usual when he stayed with Lisa or she with him, which as he pondered was almost every night since they came together, Lisa had already prepared two Vicodin and a glass of water for him on the nightstand. He swallowed them and emptied the glass. Suddenly a smell penetrated his nose. He lifted his head and squinted over the foot of the bed.

Cuddy had kept her word and had ordered him a whole cart of breakfast. House smirked and then let himself fall backwards again, stroking his hand lazily over his tummy, the sheet only pulled up to his waist. Life somehow seemed great at the time. He had a girl, constant sex and banter,m witty conversation and food. How could it get any better than this?

His minds Question was answered when the door opened and the familiar 'click clack' filled the room.

'Meeting was canceled. Food poisoning struck down most of the doctors. I was spared because you invited me.'

Cuddy came to an abrupt halt when she spotted Greg on the bed like this. He was sprawled lazily, his body stretched, pulling the skin tight over his toned body, really revealing all his muscles. The sheet had ridden down considerably by him stretching and left nothing much to imagination. His eyes were closed and the ever prominent smirk on his lips which were wet from him licking them.

A jolt went through Lisa, leaving her almost breathless, lust swamping her once again.

_'God I feel like a rabbit!'_

Her sex drive was definitely in overdrive at the moment.

_'Probably have to make up for all the wasted years'  
_

House opened one eye and squinted at Lisa.

'Are you planning to join me any time soon?'


	32. Chapter 32

**Authors Note:** Tsingtao beer is real existent.

To the Reviews:

**glicine: **Here as promised, I tried not taking too long I hope

**huddyaddicted: **I'm happy you enjoyed sweety, and thanks for all the steady commenting. And I would love to see the previous bedscenes too!! Sprawled out Greg House...yummy

**chris-am:** Thanks so much for the review you've left me. Ego Boost )

** HotlipsPierce: **Hehe note to self: Must find guy like him and never get outta bed again.

* * *

**.: Flashback:.**

Lisa Cuddy's head dropped on the book she had been reading, before she had fallen asleep. It was somewhere around twelve and she should've been in bed hours ago but she had been sick the week before and had to get some revising done to catch up.

A knock on her dorm room door made her jolt upright.

'What the...'

She wiped her face, trying to get the sleepiness out of her foggy brain while deciding if she just dreamed it had knocked. Another knock confirmed that she hadn't. Lisa scrambled to the door, pulling the blanket tighter around her to shield her from the October cold.

Cuddy looked through the peephole and groaned. It was her personal nemesis Gregory House on the other side of the door.

'C'mon open Cuddles. I come bearing Thai food.'

'House...it's in the middle of the night!'

'Yea and your light was still on. Still revising?'

Reluctantly she pulled the door open, blinking against the sharpness of the hall light.

'Fine. Come in but you better have some Kung Pao chicken and a Wan Tan soup in there.'

Clearing the table of her books Lisa made space for him to put the take out down.

'Where can you get take out at this time of the night?'

'I always tip.'

House waggled his brows at her and started setting up the containers, handed her chopsticks and then sat down, only to stand back up and get rid of the book underneath his ass. Frowning he read the titled.

'Diagnosing Auto-immun... the author is an idiot, he leaves out important information but thats just my thoughts.'

Lisa shot him a look, then frowned at the book too. It was an ok book, some extra reading for her lecture, still she had known House for two semesters now and when he said a book sucked than he was right with that.

'You could've told me that when I was borrowing it.'

He shrugged and dug into his fried noodles with duck with gusto, taking a huge gulp from his Tsingtao beer.

'So, caught up on the rest of your semester?'

'Mostly. I wanted to revise some Anatomy again, haven't done that last semester and I know they like to ask that in the finals.'

'Could happen. Go out with me tomorrow Night.'

Again! She had to give him that, he was persistent. Two semesters, he would ask her every week to go out with him, and each week she would decline.

'House, you know the answer to that. Why don't you stop asking?'

'Because you won't stop hanging out with me. If you were that serious and so against it you would simply quit seeing me.'

'I tried that. Right when you started harassing me. You wouldn't leave!'

'House, please don't. I have enough stress right now.'

The conversation ceased after that and House didn't ask again.

_.: A Week Later:._

It was Friday once again. Another week had passed and another weekend was starting. Lisa walked out of the lecture hall with a slight jump to her step, feeling the pressure floating from her after seeing in the lecture that she was in the game again.

Once outside her gaze swept the grounds, searching for an all two familiar lanky frame usually just leaning against the entrance way to wait for her. House wasn't anywhere near though and Cuddy frowned. That was unusual. It was Friday, he was supposed to wait and ask her out. He never changed his routine.

'Hey Lise!'

Amanda, a friend and study group partner of hers put her hand onto Lisa's should and stopped her.

'Oh hey Amanda! Say have you seen House?'

'Oh...actually thats why I stopped you. Say do you guys have an argument or something?'

'What...no! Why?'

Amanda bit her lower lip intently, her eyes wandering back and forth between her and a spot over her shoulder. Cuddy turned and once more swept the lawns, what she found almost made her drop her books. Sure enough she found Greg House on the bench they usually sat at. Only that in his arms was some girl she hadn't seen before, intently hanging to every word he said to her.

Somehow Cuddy had made it back home before letting what she saw get to her. Throwing herself onto the bed she let her tears flow, not really knowing what was going on but definitely being thrown off by the pang of heavy jealousy she had felt when she saw Greg and that other girl.

**.:Flashback end:.**

Lisa smiled and turned the page of her old college scrap book. While House was still at the hospital solving the newest puzzle, Lisa had filed out as early as possible and went home, intent on her goal of relaxing. While she had searched for a book she had found this. Their History in pictures. She had to admit that she had forgotten she had this book, now she sat huddled in her plush armchair with a glass of red wine and enjoyed the assault of memories as she flipped page per page.

Half of the pictures had been made by House, who had gotten a camera from his mother to some Christmas and had used that as an excuse to make a picture of her and them at any moment possible. Later she would receive a picture via mail to her birthdays and Christmas, slowly making the book retell their story.

Back then the summer seemed endless. Days spend on the University lawns, learning together or just reading and arguing. Nights spend at bars, where House would sometimes play. Holidays spend together, reluctantly from her part, but now knowing that the times he wasn't there were the ones she had truly understood that even if she didn't want it, She, Lisa Cuddy, had become friends with the notorious Gregory House.

Her front door creaked open and a gush of freezing air made its way though her front hall and into her sitting room before the door was being shut close loudly. It made her shiver and pull the blanket tighter around her lithe frame. She heard his cane dropping, his curses and groans as he had to bend to pick it up, then rustling, probably his coat being hung. After that silence stretched into what seemed to be minutes but where probably only seconds.

Lisa put the scrapbook down on the pile of books on her florr, stood and made her way around her house, finding Greg in her kitchen.

'Hey...you solved the case?'

Houses shoulders slumped visibly before he shook his head softly. He took the whistling pot from the stove and poured the boiling water into two cups, the smell of Chai tea wafting warmly through the air.

Cuddy waited, knowing that comfort was only needed if he requested it. House finally turned to her, an air of tiredness around him.

'Guy coded, we couldn't get him back. Autopsy will tell us what it was.'

Greg handed her a cup with steaming tea and then took his own, following her to her living room.

'You wanna talk about it?'

'Not really. It's just annoys me that we didn't even get a chance to say: it's never Lupus!'

Sarcasm was a good defense. Or so House had learned.

'Heard you sneaked out early?'

'After doing over time the better half of the week. Wait what was it,...oh yeah that Law suit from a patient against my renegade Dr, who told said patient that he was too stupid to cheat on his wife and not get an STD and the crabs, while walking out into the waiting room, so that everyone including his wife and children, could hear it.'

Lisa snorted and rolled her eyes at him before taking her place in her armchair again. House however stood frozen to the spot, looking down at the pile of books, more specifically on the topmost book.

'Found it today.'

'Is that...?'

'Yea, the University time scrap book.'

She picked it up and held it to him, waiting for Greg to take it, he didn't.

'You kept them...'

It was no question, it was astonishment. He would've never thought that she would keep the pictures and even arrange them in a scrap book. Doing that took time and devotion. Thats why he could never bring himself to do it. So he send the pictures to her, for he couldn't keep them but neither could he destroy the oh so cherished memories.

'It were good times.'

The ghost of a smile passed over his features, his eyes glued to the leather bound book. Still he couldn't get his hand to grab it. Too many bad memories associated with the time he started sending her the pictures, getting rid of their memories in his apartment one by one, getting rid of her, for the sake of his relationship with Stacy.

She had never understood the filigree bond between him and Lisa, never wanted to understand nor tolerate the picture box she was never allowed to touch. Stacy had asked him a few times what he was looking through late nights whenever they had an argument, asked him, pleading even, to show her the pictures. So House had started sending them away, knowing that if he couldn't let go of Lisa and their past, he could never have Stacy and a future, still believing back then that that was all he wanted.

'At the beginning I wanted...to throw them away. But I never actually could bring myself to it. So I bought this.'

Lisa put the book back on the ground and sipped her tea, watching House shuffle to the other armchair, sitting down heavily.

She finished her tea in silence, knowing that was the best cure for him. Before she left for bed she dropped a kiss on his cheek.

'Don't stay up too long.'


	33. Chapter 33

House had been sitting in the armchair for hours, gazing at the photo book. It were supposed to be happy memories, now more than ever. Still a kind of pang went through him when he thought about it, his hand shaky whenever he tried to reach out for it.

While he sat he barely thought of anything else. He wondered how much it must've hurt Lisa, putting each picture into the book, opening Pandora's box of memories.

Somewhere past midnight his hand was steady as it reached forward. His fingertips grazed then leather, memorizing the texture and storing it deep in his mind. He opted to look through it from the last page back to the first. Pain first happiness to cure it.

The last picture was of their Christmas together, their last Christmas. Lisa had gotten an intern at another Hospital in the city. They had been happy that she worked there too, same city, still they wanted to wait a little longer to move in together. Both knowing they needed their respective spaces.

_'Hold still or the picture will be shaken...Lisa hold still' Greg leaned down and smooched her cheek, both laughing widely._

_'Stop it...Greg! That must be the hundredths photo you have taken.'_

_He hugged her tighter, looking down at her tenderly._

_'You're beautiful.'_

House swallowed hard and closed to book again, taking deep breaths. He couldn't understand why memories always pained him so. Why he wasn't able to look at an old picture without feeling the weight of remorse settling on him heavily. Back then he could walk, laugh, love without trying not to hit his injured leg. Back then he was able to look into a mirror without disgust.

A few months after that picture was taken he had started his affair with Stacy. She had been a patient when he was in clinic, left her number with him and somehow he had found himself ending up in a bar with her, telling her how hard he had it with his girl, never once seeing her. All she had replied was that maybe it wasn't gonna work out.

Two weeks after that, House had taken Stacy home with him after meeting for Lunch. Thats when Lisa came home early.

___'Greg I'm home early and I brought us some Sandwiches. You will not believe how I had to fight for that damn Reuben!'_

___House woke with a start, his eyes wide, sweeping the room erratic, his pulse and heartbeat hard and fast. He heard her steps and looked down at his companion, fear and disgust sweeping him. Before he could stand up and make it out the room, the door opened and Lisa stepped in._

___'He got pretty nasty but I could...Oh God!'_

___She looked up in mid tirade, eyes wide with shock and hurt._

___'Lisa...'_

___She ran._

House opened the book at an earlier page. Lisa's graduation. A smile broke from his face at the picture of Lisa pulling a dorky face at him in her robe and hat, while receiving her diploma. Greg chuckled dryly and stroked his fingers over the pictures on the pages. Her graduation, the party afterwards, someone had made a picture of them kissing while he handed Lisa her present.

_____'Open it.'_

_____House smirked at her, watching with glee as Lisa pulled at the bow to open the box._

_____'Oh my God! GREGORY HOUSE!!!'_

_____Her face was contorted with held back laughter and a bit of embarrassment. Lisa closed the lit again, blushing for real. Inside rested a leather nurses outfit, that she guessed he had gotten from some sex shop._

_____'So will you be my doctor tonight?'_

Greg sipped the last gulps of the long cold tea, flipping page per page. Memories reeked havoc in his tired brain, bringing the headache of the decade with them. Rubbing his temples he groaned and finally set the book down around 2 in the morning.

Cuddy felt the bed dip behind her as House got in, making it possible for cold air to sweep under blanket Goosebumps pebbled her flesh, a shiver racking her.

'What...time is it?'

'Shhh ...2...go back to sleep.'

She nodded and let herself be pulled into his warming embrace, forgiving him for waking her. House buried his face in her full hair, taking a deep breath, inhaling her smell.

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

When he clambered into the kitchen that Sunday morning, it was already filled with delicious smells of breakfast. Lisa only took time to prepare this on Sundays. Waffles and Pancakes were already on the table, the smell of coffee penetrated his nostrils and Lisa was currently pressing out some Oranges and grapefruits.

House casually leaned against the kitchen door frame, watching her every move. She was still in her frilly nightgown, which was not far from being translucent. He walked up to her after awhile, pressing his long frame against her back, his arms encircling her and pulling her against his torso, while his lips busied themselves on her neck and shoulders.

'Good morning!'

'Morning...why didn't you wake me? Now I missed all the fun.'

'Last time I woke you you only watched me and made crude comments.'

Cuddy pushed him away a little to get room for preparing the breakfast, smiling as he pouted at her.

Once he had seated himself he waited for Lisa to get the pitcher on the table, as soon as she did so he grabbed her around the waist and made her sit sideways on his good leg, his nose buried in her neck.

'Hey hey...what's gotten into you today mister cheery?'

House bit her neck tenderly and then smiled up at her.

'I...took a look at the scrap book yesterday night. I...I often miss those times. When we were happy, ready to take on the world. When...I could look at myself in the morning without pitying myself. Maybe...I want that back more than ever before.'

'Greg...wanting things back, is understandable. But back then we were practically young adults. We could take on the world and be happy because we hadn't lived yet. I love you, now, today, like I loved that man Greg back then.'

Cuddy blushed at admitting the range of her feelings and slid of his lap, giving him space and busying herself with loading his plate.

' I understand what you mean Lise! Don't worry I'm sure I can't stop being the insufferable ass that I usually am.'

House waggled his brows and snatched a waffle of her plate. Live somehow seemed tolerable.

**THE END **

* * *

I've decided to end it here for now. It's a good point to say stop.Thanks to all for reading and reviewing! 


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